totallyoverwhelmed

2007-05-26T18:21:00.000-07:00

"TOTALLY OVERWHELMED", NO BORING READ!!!

EXCERPTS FROM ...

Chapter 1

Thoughts from Diary Entry…

When love goes it’s like watching a movie in slow motion. It feels like a dull, sharp, aching pain. I planted flowers late spring and I was faithful in watering and caring for them. One week, however, it was very hot and humid and I neglected my flowers. I didnt water them and I didnt care for them. You know what happened to the flowers. That’s how it is, when love goes.
…TTD

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Experience has taught me that God carefully orchestrates the inevitable events in our lives, to shape us into His divine people so that we may live out His perfect will. I find it somewhat of a paradox that we often live trying to be in the will of God all the while not fully understanding what His will is.

We live our lives feeling as though things are going according to plan until something devastating occurs. I’d like to refer to these devastating situations as “9-1-1 situations.” With the onset of such situations, we eagerly question the decisions we have made sometimes thinking they’re the cause of the 9-1-1 situations we find ourselves facing. These situations also cause us to question our position with God. It’s amazing to me that one phone call, one conversation, one trip, one visit, one devastating situation can alter what we think God’s plan for our life is. It’s amazing, yet it happens and I know it happens because it happened to me.

TYNA T. DUNCAN-LANDERS' NEW BOOK RELEASE.....

"TOTALLY OVERWHELMED"

THIS BOOK, TYNA T. DUNCAN-LANDERS' NEW BOOK, "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED" IS AVAILABLE FOR PURCHASE AT http://www.totallyoverwhelmed.com/

Keith L. Landers' book "Invite God into Your Bedroom" gives men instruction on sharing their feelings!

2007-04-01T15:58:00.000-07:00

Keith L. Landers in his new book "Invite God into Your Bedroom" tells men to share their inner feelings for their wives,. WOW !!

"I thirst…from the primal center of my being I thirst for you. I can feel my heart beating in a hollow tone that craves to be filled. There is a glistening on your lips just after they’ve been kissed. Moistly just wet and tenderly sweet like capsules of pleasure releasing the honey sweet nectar of your flavor that is a calming death to all of my ills.

When I kiss you I have no pains, no fears or broken places. Your warmth soothes the beast within me and breaks the chilling grasp of despair. To feel the soft touch of your body against my own comforts my spirit and causes my soul to want to know you more and more. I love to touch your every place, never finishing always continuing, feeling the pulse of blood coursing through your body like waves if majestic power searching for an opening to erupt in exquisite delight. The curve of your neck softly kissed seasoned with droplets of “good-to-me” places that cause me to feel the stir in your breast as they rise in jealous wanting, asking in silent moans to be taken into my mouth and adored with gentle suck. The warmth of my breath against your swollen nipple sends ripples through out your body.

I feel your passions rising as I slowly move my tongue from the bottom of your left breast just barely touching the surface of your skin stopping just enough to allow the feelings to invade every place in my mind. I approach the mound of your nipple teasing its tender texture with my teeth and softly kissing and pulling from it every ounce of tingling satisfaction within its billowing stores. I feel you surrendering to the mounting urges you feel in your vaginal region. You feel the moister oozing along your inner thighs as you arch your head back as if to open the windows of your soul creating a pathway for giving out and taking in. I am seduced into a place where all things are pure, as the tips of my fingers discover again for the first time the every place of your entire body.

The more I touch you the more I am drawn into the mystic realm of complete satisfaction. Your taste, like a thousand foot water fall pouring its power down the side of a mountain into a jungle of luscious passion and pleasure, washing away the grime of a life time of ravenous hunger. Your spirit opens to me like wet virginal lips spreading apart, wanting to take in the probing fullness of a hardened penis as it carves its passion's fury into its inner region. Knowing its coming from a man that knows, loves and respects every part of you..."

Tyna T. Duncan-Landers asks..."What the HELL does life amount to?" In her new book, "Totally Overwhelmed"!

2007-02-18T11:07:00.000-08:00

Excerpts from THE NEW BOOK RELEASE, "Totally Overwhelmed".

Thoughts from Diary Entry of Tyna T. Duncan-Landers…

~"How do I live in this present moment? Does anyone realize all we really have is this moment? It’s never an hour later. It’s never tomorrow. It’s never next month, next year or even 10 years from now. It’s always today. The current time, the current year, the current month is always today.

~Learning this had helped me live in this present moment. It’s been a journey filled with discovery about self, about the world around, about the interaction between myself and the world. This journey has been filled with joy, pain, realities on multiple levels, relationships, happiness, tears, excitement, disappointments, exhilaration, depression, grief, love, hate, positives, negatives, anger, peace, tranquility, frustration, acceptances, rejections, successes, and failures. With all of these things flowing on the journey, most of the trip is boring…meaningless and I feel alone.

~And what the hell does it all amount to? What is the true value of discovery? For some it leads them to believe in nothing and no one. For others, its belief in an endless number of possibilities.

~What color is life? Is it one color or all the colors? Or is it no color at all? How do you interpret the colors? What do you really see? Do we see what is really there or do we interpret what we bases upon experiences and baggage?"

…TTD

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For information on the author, Tyna T. Duncan-Landers or how to purchase your copy of "Totally Overwhelmed", please go to the book's official website below.

http://www.totallyoverwhelmed.com/

Thanks!

Tyna T. Duncan-Landers' Book, "Totally Overwhelmed" Scores an ALL THUMBS UP!

2006-11-11T21:58:00.002-08:00

"It took months for me to find my way back to my own problems. I was so depressed and grief stricken by life in general it was all I could do to live. Helping Farr during her six months of chemotherapy kept me from dealing with my personal struggles but it also deterred me from rebuilding the church. Over that last eight months, nothing really changed financially and it was hard to press through the strong memories of the church's past."

In Picture top left:
(from left to right) Armon Tolliver,
Tyna T. Duncan-Landers
and Ernie Duncan, III

"I remember sitting in New Year’s Eve Service of 1999. Everything looked foreign to me. It didn’t feel like I was sitting in that same church I worked so diligently to build those previous 12 years. I didn’t feel like I knew who I was anymore. My sons had changed. My friends had changed. My entire life had changed. In addition, it pained me to be a part of this new life knowing how exuberant my old life had been. I barely moved out of my seat that night. I don’t think I really engaged in the service that night.

The Tyna even I knew was gone. The breaking point I felt I had reached so many times during my 9-1-1 situations had come and went that year and I sat there that night completely broken. I had nothing left to give. So it was that night, the eve of New Years 1999, I realized I was not going to be able to continue as Pastor of TWC.

It was that night I admittedly gave up all of those things I lived for."

YOU HAVE JUST READ EXCERPTS FROM TYNA T. DUNCAN-LANDERS' NEW BOOK, "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED".

YOU CAN PURCHASE A COPY OF TOTALLY OVERWHELMED BY GOING TO THE OFFICIAL WEBSITE FOR THE BOOK.
http://www.totallyoverwhelmed.com

Tyna T. Duncan-Landers' Book, "Totally Overwhelmed" Scores an ALL THUMBS UP!

2006-11-11T21:58:00.000-08:00

I remember sitting in New Year’s Eve Service of 1999. Everything looked foreign to me. It didn’t feel like I was sitting in that same church I worked so diligently to build those previous 12 years. I didn’t feel like I knew who I was anymore. My sons had changed. My friends had changed. My entire life had changed. In addition, it pained me to be a part of this new life knowing how exuberating my old life had been. I barely moved out of my seat that night. I don’t think I really engaged in the service that night.

The Tyna even I knew was gone. The breaking point I felt I had reached so many times during my 9-1-1 situations had come and went that year and I sat there that night completely broken. I had nothing left to give. So it was that night, the eve of New Years 1999, I realized I was not going to be able to continue as Pastor of TWC.>FONT>

It was that night I admittingly gave up all of those things I lived for."

YOU CAN PURCHASE A COPY OF TOTALLY OVERWHELMED BY GOING OT THE OFFICIAL WEBSITE FOR THE BOOK.

www.totallyoverwhelmed.com

Thank you.

Bishop J. Delano Ellis comments on new book by Author, Tyna T. Duncan-Landers, "Totally Overwhelmed"!

2006-11-02T19:32:00.000-08:00

Bishop J. Delano Ellis comments on Tyna T. Duncan-Landers' new book release,"Totally Overwhelmed"!

“Totally Over-whelmed” is the description of a soul on fire with no means for distinguishing the difference between destructive combustion and energy for forward moving. Reverend Tyna is one of the few who fought to arise from her ashes and point the way back to wholeness as does the mythological Phoenix. I’m compelled to recommend this down-to-earth treaty on life to men and women alike in hopes that they will use it as a tool for self-help and a guide for others who stumble through the jungles of ministry without good road maps.

"Thank you, my sister, for allowing God to bring you back from your brinks of depression and uncertainty. Your testimony and memoir's will bless generations, especially ladies in this fast-paced mega-century who struggle to cope and survive the deceits of brothers and others who've not prepared themselves to be overcomers."

Thank You, Tyna T. Duncan-Landers

Tyna T. Duncan-Landers' NEW BOOK, "Totally Overwhelmed" POWERFUL STORY!!

2006-10-17T14:51:00.000-07:00

"Totally Overwhelmed" isnt just a book. Its a chapter in Tyna T. Duncan-Landers' story called life. Tyna went through several trying years that nearly crippled her mentally and took her to what she thought was the end of the road. Within these pages lies Landers' depiction of the events that tried to overtake her. Now free from it all, the author has taken a moment to explore the events that helped bring Tyna T. Duncan-Landers forward to, this moment.

Tyna invites you to travel back in time with her as she explores three of the most detrimental years that helped shape her into the woman she is today. Come and let TYNA T. DUNCAN-LANDERS show you just how totally overwhelmed she had become.

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"TOTALLY OVERWHELMED" IS AVAILABLE FOR PURCHASE AT www.totallyoverwhelmed.com.strong>

UPDATE>>>UPDATE>>>
Keith L. Landers will be releasing his NEW BOOK SERIES ON "ANOINTED TO MAKE LOVE". Its hot and helpful for all couples!! Its a must for your library. Please leave us a comment at www.keithandtynalanders.blogspot.com. We will get information to you ASAP on this new book series! WE PROMISE IT WILL BLESS YA!!

Tyna T. Duncan-Landers' New Book, "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED" RELEASED!!

2006-09-22T12:00:00.000-07:00

FOR INFORMATION ON HOW TO PURCHASE YOUR COPY OF TYNA T. DUNCAN-LANDERS' NEW BOOK, "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED", email us at tow@totallyoverwhelmed.com

THE "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED" WEBSITE is under construction.

Check it out at...www.totallyoverwhelmed.com

Tyna T. Duncan-Landers' New Book, "Totally Overwhelmed" Dedicated to her Parents and Sons!

2006-09-17T21:24:00.000-07:00
This book is written In Loving Memory of my parents,
Reverend Curtis F. and Mrs. Hattie L. Davis.

Every day I breathe the fragrance of all that you are to me. You taught me to love family, to be loyal, to laugh, to be true to God, to follow my convictions and most importantly, to embrace being a servant of God. You “let the light from your light house shine… and it shined… on me”. I love you Mommie and Daddy.

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This book is dedicated to my two sons,
Ernest “Ernie” L. Duncan, III and Jeremy Alan Duncan, Sr.

My Dearest Sons,

You are my life and inspiration. My love for you helped sustain me through my darkest moments. You were to me like the stem of a flower that allowed me to draw strength from the manure infested soil around me. I am beginning to blossom again fresh and new. Walk with God. It is your destiny to become strong and wise men of God. Our love is forever.

Mom
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Book Thank Yous and Acknowledgements....

To Cassondra R. Cory, my precious princess "Di"... As the creative writer and steadfast supporter on this book project, thank you doesn’t seem adequate to say, for the work you’ve done over the past year to make this book the literary work that it has become. My experiences would be mere words had you not picked up your pen and placed your "creative genius" on my story. God has great things in store for you, Di!

To my Husband, Keith L. Landers, "you took my heart by surprise!" I look forward to every moment of every day we spend as one. You have given me a reason to live again! My love is yours and yours alone. It is omnipresent… it exist in all times, all places in every dimension. Thank you for finding me.

To my only brother, Frank… You are all that’s left of our first family. If God had taken me to a time and place before you were and given me the privilege to choose the perfect brother, I would have chosen you just as you are. I will always love you ‘cause… ”you ain’t heavy, you’re my brother!”

Special Thanks to my “Aunti”, Ann Stokes for your love, prayers and endless support. And I dare not forget the chicken noodles! You’ve always being there for me, Aunti. You are a jewel most rare, eternally priceless and forever treasured.

To my beloved god-daughter, Michelle Pilgrim, through the good and the bad years and times, you were the one constant. Thank you for always being there and never judging me. I’ve learned so many things from you. As God used the “dirty raven” to sustain Elijah, I appreciate you for being my “Dirty Raven”.

To Evelyn and Joe Sears, Baffour and Tonette Otchere, Dawn Marie "Phar-Cletus" Coleman, my spiritual sons and daughters, my dearest friends and family. You’ve been to me Columns of strength and pillows of sustaining rest. I could not have endured the press with out you. I will never forget your many prayers and kindnesses.

Special Thanks to Rev. and Mrs. Gerald Sylver and the Freedom Temple Family for the many years of steadfast prayer. You were my city of refuge.

To Bishop J. Delano and Elder Sabrina Ellis... thank you for believing in me when it felt like no one else did. When I was an outcast and deemed unusable by people, you embraced me, consecrated me and gave me a place where I could exercise my gifts and talents. You were my hero.

Lyle, thank you for your role in making this dream a reality.

Lady Karen Turner, you are a gift to the body of Christ and to me. Thank you for editing this work and for your guidance throughout the publishing process. You, Karen and your husband, Pastor Carl Turner are dear friends.

Thank You Pastor Johnnie Lockhart and the Agape Christian Training Center for believing in this book project.

Last but not least… In affectionate reflection of a Camelot moment in time… The Testament Worship Center.

NEW BOOK,"TOTALLY OVERWHELMED"...RELEASE DATE OCTOBER, 2006

2006-09-15T21:45:00.000-07:00

Hello,
This is going to be what the cover will look like..IT IS NOT FINISHED AND I KNOW THERE'S A TYPO ON PHOENIX... IT WILL BE CORRECTED. But I am so excited, I wanted to share it with you a head of time! Please leave me a comment if you like, about the cover!!

Thanks for your time, Tyna T. Duncan-Landers

ABOUT THE AUTHOR OF NEW BOOK RELEASE, "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED"

TYNA T. DUNCAN-LANDERS is the President of "The National Association of Women Ministers, Inc." She is a proud wife, mother, grandmother, preacher, teacher, friend, author and lover of all mankind. Tyna is an advocate for the rights of the poor and women ministers who have experienced injustice and inequality in the religious community! She is in process of publishing her first work.

It is an autobiography about 3 tragic, unbelievable years of her life as a women Pastor and minister. And how those events affected Tyna and her family. The book tells a story of divorce, humor, tears, death, prison, intrigue, sex, men, betrayal, and drugs. Tyna speaks of her extended family, her journey from living a financially comfortable lifestyle to homelessness, loss of her businesses, the violence she experienced...And much more! All real life stuff Tyna T. Duncan-Landers lived through!!

A NOTE ABOUT THE PHOENIX REBORN...
The phoenix was chosen to represent strength, hope and rebirth, as well as transformation. The image of the phoenix emerging from the ashes of complete destruction...Rises gloriously and triumphantly from the ashes to live again!

Thus, the phoenix, the ancient mythical creature that is consumed by flames, only to be reborn anew, is another symbol of transformation and a representation of the grief response. I WILL RISE AGAIN! TTL

For information on purchasing "Totally Overwhelmed", please email us at tynatduncan@gmail.com.

Woman at Her Lowest Point, Tyna T. Duncan

2006-09-10T20:33:00.000-07:00
Here's an excerpts from Tyna's new book, "Totally Overwhelmed".

We went back to Cincinnati following that vacation. I found myself at my lowest point ever. In the middle of December, 1996, E had been car jacked, nearly beat to death, and almost shot. I didn’t think I could take any more. That was when I realized those winds that blew with a vengeance in 1997 had begun blowing gently over my life.

The fact that I blacked out in the Bahamas scared me. Nursing my son back to health caused me to realize the way we were living needed to change. Not sure what to do next, I booked another ticket to the Bahamas. This time I was going alone. I needed time alone to sort through years of bottled up thoughts and feelings. It was cold in the Bahamas during that time. I remember sitting outside looking out at the beach saying out loud, God, I can’t take any more. Something’s got to change. It was only a matter of weeks before that change began to take place.

Leave Tyna a Comment... Thanks!

"Emotionally Bankrupt Woman...Tyna T. Duncan-Landers tells Her Story!"

2006-09-08T08:55:00.000-07:00
Tyna T. Duncan-Landers writes Powerful New Book!!

Here is an excerpt.

We went back to Cincinnati following that vacation. I found myself at my lowest point ever. In the middle of December, 1996, E had been car jacked, nearly beat to death, and almost shot. I didnt think I could take any more. That was when I realized those winds that blew with a vengeance in 1997 had begun blowing gently over my life. The fact that I blacked out in the Bahamas scared me. Nursing my son back to health caused me to realize the way we were living needed to change. Not sure what to do next, I booked another ticket to the Bahamas. This time I was going alone. I needed time alone to sort through years of bottled up thoughts and feelings. It was cold in the Bahamas during that time. I remember sitting outside looking out at the beach saying out loud, God, I cant take any more. Somethings got to change. It was only a matter of weeks before that change began to take place.

More excerpts to come...Thanks for stopping by!!

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Tyna T. Duncan-Landers..."When her world was turned up side down!"

2006-09-05T20:26:00.000-07:00

...excerpts from Tyna's New Book, "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED"

"Instances like that financial situation affected me but eventually I reached a point in which I wasnt sure what affected me more. I was angry about my marriage, disempowered by my felony conviction, devastated by the death of my mother and distraught over the loss of my businesses. Every time I was faced with a 9-1-1 situation, I found depression right there ready to comfort me. At the onset of each dilemma, not blinded by what the spirit represented, I would let it overtake me just long enough to wallow in my own sorrow. At my discretion it occupied a place in my life. The more I toyed with it, the harder it became to let it go. Depression is a condition that my family has carried for many generations. It crippled my great grandmother, it escorted my grandmother to an early grave, my brother had been having bouts with it since the death of my mother, and as I went through the first two quarters of 1997 I found myself all too familiar with it. I knew how detrimental it could, yet I couldnt help but entertain it. And the more I did, the closer I got to losing myself in it. Outside of the minimal interaction I had with the church members, I communicated with no one. I cut myself off from society and became a stranger to the world around me."

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For Information on Booking Tyna T. Duncan-Landers for speaking engagements, please contact Tyna at tynatduncan@gmail.com.

Thanks for stopping by!

"Author Tyna T. Duncan-Landers writes A Love Note to Her New Husband, Keith L. Landers"

2006-09-04T20:52:00.000-07:00

My Dearest Love,

I am not as eloquent as you are… when it comes to expressing our love. But in my own words and in own way, I want you and the world to know, how deeply I love you.

I love you with a depth that can only spring from the mind and heart of God. It was Divine Providence that we met.

This love I feel for you awakes me each morning renewed, happy and fulfilled. I go throughout every day with purpose, warmth and a sense of expecting the best each moment. I cant wait to see you in the evening when the sun is going down…you know how much I love dusk. That has not always been the case.

Before I fell in love with you, dusk was a sad and lonely time of the day for me. Between day light ending and the night fall beginning, I would always feel a longing for my soul-mate…that one man that I could talk over the days events, eat dinner with, and at bed time, just get in the bath tub with and CHILL. I have that and much more with you.

I love you unconditionally. I love you completely. I love you without boundaries. My love for you has no relativity to time or space. I know the depth and breath of my love for you will continue to grow… “for as long I live”.

Thank you, Keith for finding me.

Your soul mate and Wife, Tyna.

Tyna T. Duncan-Landers ... My Most Intimate Thoughts and Reflections.

2006-08-30T22:37:00.000-07:00

Intimate Thoughts from TYNA'S Diary...

'KIDNAPPING OF A DIFFERENT KIND'
I am living through a kidnapping of another kind. Bad people physically snatch children out of the surroundings that are familiar to them. They take them away from the people that love and care for them. They force them into a new environment and make them go along with whatever is happening to them. It’s so unfair and so horrible when people steal children. They have no choice in what happens to them. They are small, trusting, helpless, defenseless and vulnerable. They are forced to decide their own fate by whether or not they succumb to whatever the kidnapper demands.

It feels to me as though my sons have been kidnapped. Physically they haven’t been kidnapped because they are right here with me. I can see them, hug them, talk them, and love them. Mentally and emotionally they are no longer within my reach. The life that they once knew has been snatched away from them. I’m helpless. I can’t get that back for them. And because I can’t get that back, I can’t get apart of them back. I don’t know where they are so I can’t help them. All I can do is cry. I’ve cried so much that apart of me has died missing them while they are away. They are like a shell of a person. So much of them have been lost. They are functional yet they are lost and helpless. They are just wandering trying to figure this out. They are trying to work through all of this. They are blindly learning to feel their way out of the darkness they are in.
…TTD

MORE EXCERPTS TO COME FROM..."TOTALLY OVERWHELMED" AUTHOR TYNA T. DUNCAN

Tyna T. Duncan says..."Women need to be AWARE."

2006-08-30T21:56:00.000-07:00
Excerpts from, "Totally Overwhelmed" Author Tyna T. Duncan

They found my car in Washington DC. When they found it, they also found the person who stole it. They found AMW. He called me a few days later. He told me the reason he stole my car was because I no longer wanted to be in a relationship with him. According to him, that was the only way he knew to get my attention. Stealing my car was his way of getting me to talk to him. For the second time in a row, his plan backfired. Not sympathetic to his cause, I pressed charges against him. Not only had he committed a federal offense but he inconvenienced me during a time that I really needed to be mobile. He was arrested and jailed. He sent me a letter from jail apologizing for what he had done and the way he had done it. He also reiterated why he had done it. I never responded to his letter. Ive also havent spoken to him since our phone conversation when he called to apologize for what he did. That incident killed the chances of us remaining friends.

My car was taken to the police station. Someone had to go down and sign for it. I sent my brother to get it. Even though he inspected it at the police station he looked over it with me once he got it to the house to verify it was in good condition when he got it to the house. Even though it had been missing for about a month, no major damage was done. As we walked into the house, he started laughing. I remember turning to him and saying,Whats so funny? He handed me a black cassette tape he said he wanted me to hear. He went in the kitchen to get something to drink while inquisitively went into the living room and placed the tape in the cassette player. As the tape began to play and I listened to it I couldnt hide the fact that I was anxious to hear what amused him so. My brother came walking into the living room just as the tape began to play. I recognized the voice immediately. It was AMW. It sounded like he was preaching. As we sat listening to the tape we laughed so hard I had to get up twice to go to the bathroom. In so many words, this man had taken my life in Cincinnati and made it his own. He spoke about having a church and a family, owning businesses, have a PHD, being active in the community the whole nine. Apparently AMW had been using my car to travel to different preaching engagements. How funny is that? He was using a stolen car to travel to various cities to preach the Gospel of Jesus Christ. And when he preached, he used my story and my identity.

Thanks for stopping by!

Tyna T. Duncan

I was so sick of the PORN!!

2006-08-28T17:08:00.000-07:00

I was a firm believer on including Big E in everything that went on in our children’s lives. I wasn’t always enthusiastic about doing so because it didn’t take much to upset him but I knew I needed to include my husband in this. I was certain he would get even more upset than I was. That night, after dinner I told him. “I think the boys have been watching pornography. I’m having bills sent to the house to verify it.” His body language did not suggest he was upset and his facial expression didn’t suggest he was surprised. He just sat there unmoved by what I said. This should have been my first indicator the problem was deeper than what I was anticipating but I attributed his response to the fact that he was in one of his moods and I dropped the conversation that night. Before the bills came, I asked the boys in passing if they had been watching pornography. They both said yes. Even though they admitted they had been watching it, when the bills came, I was irate. It was one thing to have been told over the phone pornography was being ordered in my home. It was another to actually see the orders on the bill! There was so much pornography being ordered it was ridiculous. I studied the bills and found the same pornographic movies being watched sometimes two and three times a night. One month there was an additional $300.00 charged for pornography alone. I wanted an explanation so I called a family meeting the day after the bills came. It was held in our living room. The boys arrived before their father and I did. They were sitting beside each other on one end of the sectional. Big E went in and sat on the other end. I remember vividly the anger I felt towards them. I paced back and forth as I told them how appalled I was for disrespecting their father and I the way that they did. I began reading each and every itemized movie that was printed on those bills. As I read the movie titles I still found myself shocked by quantity of what was listed. Some movies were listed two and three times within one week. Having come to the end of one page I threw it at the boys and continued reading as the paper flew aimlessly to the floor. With the completion of each page, I felt my anger level rise. I would periodically look only to find J peering at their father. E never took his eyes off me. The more movies I read, the angrier I got. I kept waiting on Big E to chime in with me but I got neither backing nor support from him. In fact, he didn’t say a word. He just sat there and watched me self destruct.

With each movie read and pages and pages of cable bills now lying on the floor, I started calling out the names of the shows that I could recall from the top of my head. We’re gonna sit and watch these movies as a family,” I said, “so that we can all see what you guys have found so interesting.” Not used to getting scolded from either Big E or I, E must have taken all he could handle. “Hold on mom,” he said as I start naming the order in which we were going to watch the movies. “We watched part of one show that day you came in the room. That was it.” Immediately my eyes shifted to their father. Their eyes followed. I felt so many things but above all I felt shame. I knew he had a history of pornography but two and two never equaled four. Never! When I was away, I was out preaching, growing in my calling as a minister and when I was home, I didn’t trace him down to see what he was doing if he wasn’t sitting up under me. Yet he sat there and allowed me to blame them for watching all that pornography. And if one of them wouldn’t have spoken up for themselves, he would have let them take the blame for it. He had plenty of opportunity before our meeting to speak up and say, Tyna I ordered those movies. But he never said a word. He knowingly let me blame our children for something he had done. And he was willing to expose his problem at their expense. These experiences tore at the fiber of our relationship and his relationship with his children.

With all of that being done, I still didn’t see a need to have conversations with people and try to explain to them or tell them anything. First and foremost, I knew that would not solve anything. Secondly I was feeling so much emotional pain and dealing with so many stressors that I didn’t have the energy to have meaningless conversations with people. I also didn’t know what to say. I didn’t know where to begin explaining the things that happened and how I felt. I know people were concerned about me, but the fact of the matter was, there was nothing any of them could do. And the more things happened, the more I thought talking would make a bad situation worse. I hadn’t talked all those years ago so what was the reason to start talking then? I would have looked like I was just pointing the finger at him and I never did that. I didn’t even tell my mother and father things that went on. I didn’t want to appear to be one that was talking about him and dogging him so I kept quiet. I knew there was nothing people could do. I was so angry so I knew the best thing for me to do was just be quiet.

Tyna T. Duncan wrote a book entitled, "Totally Overwhelmed" . The book records 3 short years of her devastating experiences. And how those totally overwhelming NIGHTMARES have changed her life.

Tyna believes,"WE CAN BE HEALED OF EVERY DEVASTATING EXPERIENCE THAT HAPPENS IN OUR LIVES!!"

"Totally Overwhelmed...a great book of SURVIVAL!"

2006-08-26T22:01:00.000-07:00
Excerpts from New Book..."Totally Overwhelmed!"

I heard a knock on the door and jumped ever so slightly. I am certain I was having an out of body experience and the knock on the door startled me back into reality. I looked down at my hands as I remembered where I was. The water had turned cold. My fingers were cold and withered. “Please come out of the shower,” J said. I said nothing to acknowledge I heard his request nor did I say anything that suggested I would comply. My baby was trying to reach out to me but must have walked away when he got no response. I watched the water bounce around the inside of my porcelain tub as its rhythmic pitter-patter engulfed the room’s silence. Eventually I found myself wrapped up in a towel climbing into bed. I am sure I turned the water off and put on some clothes at some point. I just don’t remember when. It hadn’t taken long at all but depression found a home in me. I stayed in bed not saying a word for over two days.

E had come home from prep school. He would come in my room periodically and pray for me. He wouldn’t try to get me to talk nor would he tell me what was going on outside of my bedroom. He’d simply come in, grab one of my hands as he sat on the edge of my bed, and he’d pray. He’d also come in and try to get me to eat. I didn’t have an appetite. I think this deeply concerned him. He called the Senior Deacon of the church, Deacon James, to come pray for me. Boy was I grateful for that. I will never forget him coming into my bedroom, kneeling down beside my bed and praying for me. Deacon James, if you and your wife are reading this book I want both of you to know I will always be grateful to the two of you for what you did for me during that period. I truly thank you.

Early Friday morning my will to live overtook the spirit of depression that had been holding me hostage in my room. I found myself thinking about the possible outcomes of my court hearing and I knew I needed to get out of that bed and do something proactive. My actions started by forcing myself to make two important phone calls. While still in bed, weak and dehydrated, I called Mr. Alexander. Even though I had not been thinking clearly about my situation, my inner man was telling me I needed to establish some course of action before someone else took action upon me. He requested Big E and I come to his office so he set up a meeting early that afternoon. Secondly, without knowing anything that was being said in the community, I knew the church members were probably agonizing over this situation and I at least needed to speak with the leaders about what was going on. So I called Deacon James and asked him to gather the leaders and meet me at my house later that evening.

Tyna T. Duncan

Tyna T. Duncan-Lander's NEW BOOK, "Totally Overwhelmed"

2006-08-26T21:06:00.000-07:00

EXCERPTS FROM "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED",
AUTHOR TYNA T. DUNCAN-LANDERS

Once through the steel door we walked toward a tall cement counter. There were two intake personnel, one white man and one black woman, standing there. The officer walked me to the front of the counter and turned me over to the intake personnel. I stood there for a moment as the officer and the intake personnel exchanged words. The officer then exited out the way we had entered and I stood watching them make what appeared to be an ID bracelet for me. The woman asked for the gold belt I was wearing and the navy blue shoe strings that were in my shoes. I gave them what they asked for without saying a word. I was too nervous to say anything. I knew they were taking the loose objects away from me because they could be used as harmful objects once inside the jail cell so there was no point in asking any questions.

It took a couple of minutes and then the white intake person walked around the counter, snatched my arms up over the cement ledge, and then let them fall against the counter concrete top so that the black woman could put the bracelet on me. I said nothing outwardly but I wanted to cry on the inside. The way he pulled my arms up and threw them up over that counter rubbing my wrists against those metal handcuffs and then letting them slam against that cement really hurt me. He showed no remorse for his roughness nor concern for how it made me feel. I swallowed, sucking in the pain, and scooted myself closer to the counter to accommodate for the awkward position I found myself in. Without realizing it I had placed my feet on these yellow foot markers painted on the cement floor. I was in the perfect position for what came next. The woman proceeded to search me. While I wasn’t asked to strip of my clothing, I felt as though I might as well have as she ran her hands up and down my body.

Once the search was complete, the man used a remote to open this glass door that was about 10 feet behind the intake counter. Almost immediately you could hear a lot of screaming. I couldn’t decipher anything that was being said because the voices were coming from all directions. It was very chaotic, all that screaming was. The intake woman walked me through the glass door and instructed I walked with her following the yellow feet on the floor. They led me to this big cell, about 15’x15’. Another glass door, the length of the cell, was opened. The hand cuffs were taken off of me and I was escorted in.

As I went into the cell I gazed the area, making myself aware of my surroundings. The floor, the seats, the wall - everything was cement. When I walked in, there was a bench on the left and a bench on the right. There were two cement polls behind each bench. Towards the back of the cell there was a small brick wall. Behind this wall was the commode. There was a clock on the left hand side of the back wall.

It was early when I got there, probably around 11:00 AM. There were only three women in the cell. One woman sat on the bench, close to the glass door, on the left hand side. The other two women were sitting on the bench on the right hand side. I walked toward the bench on the left hand side of the cell and took a seat on the back end of it, close to the cement poll. As soon as I sat down, the girl that was sitting on the opposite end got up and went to the right side of the cell. I said nothing to her or gave her no indication that I didn’t want to sit by her. She just got up and moved. I fixed my eyes on the clock on the back wall. That clock was my focal point. It kept me concentrating on when I was getting out and kept me from starring at the other women in the cell.

I appreciate your stopping by!!

Remember..."You can arise from the ashes of your life and live again."

Tyna T. Duncan

Introducing my Husband, Keith L. Landers!

2006-08-21T20:17:00.000-07:00

Since the first day I saw you my vision has not been the same. The power of my mind has increased a million fold. My heart before was broad and great but you have taken me beyond beyond, I know no limits, I can look into the heart of the sun and laugh at its folly because the light of your love burns greater than the mere flame of the sun. I am made a new, I walk among the stars with ease and comfort because your greatness gives me a balance that sustains me. All the treasures of the earth are dunn, you alone are my sacred gift. I love you with all there is. I love you once, I love you twice, I love you thrice, I love you four times, I love you forever.....

Your husband, Keith.

"...an overwhelming sense of betrayal."

2006-08-19T21:12:00.000-07:00

Here's an excerpt from the book,
"Totally Overwhelmed"
Author Tyna T. Duncan

In an interview...Tyna T. Duncan admitted,
"I try to live upstanding and do things right and be right and have prudence and it seemed like all of that was for nothing. It seemed like all of my trying to be right, do right, be a good person, be a good citizen and follow the law and be an example to people as well as to be an example to other young women and to be a good mother and good wife. It seemed as if all of those things had not meant anything and I remember often thinking why is all of this happening to me and how could all of this be happening to me when I’ve never - even the members of the church – I never tried to hurt them. I was not a vindictive person. I was not a person who felt a keen sense of justice as far as getting back at people. I wasn’t vengeful. I tried to forgive people and just do the things that would have been pleasing not only to God but to my parents as well. I experienced an overwhelming sense of betrayal."

Tyna T. Duncan would love to hear your comments and feedback about the new book, "Totally Overwhelmed".

For information on purchasing a copy of the book and personal appearances, you may contact Tyna T.Duncan via email at tynatduncan@gmail. "Totally Overwhemed" is scheduled for publication September 2006.

Tyna T. Duncan...Excerpts from the book, "Totally Overwhelmed!"

2006-07-30T15:13:00.000-07:00

Experience has taught me that God carefully orchestrates the inevitable events in our lives to shape us into His divine people in order to live out his perfect will for our lives. I find it amazing that we often live our lives not fully understanding His will.

We live our lives feeling as though things are going according to plan until a devastating situation, situation’s I’d like to refer to as “9-1-1 situations,” happens. With the onset of such a situation, we eagerly question the decisions we’ve made... sometimes thinking those decisions were the cause of those situations. We question our position with God. It’s amazing to me that one phone call, one conversation, one trip, one visit, can alter what we think God’s plan for our life is. It’s amazing to me, yet it happens. I know it happens; because it happened to me.

Thanks for stopping by...Tyna T. Duncan

2006-05-24T10:11:00.000-07:00
Tyna T. Duncan...One woman's broken heart and pain filled emotions poured out on the pages of a tear covered journal dating from 1997 to 2004. "Between 2 Mountains" chronicals Tyna T. Duncan's decending journey from one high place of glory and success to that place of transition called, THE VALLEY.

A journal entry from the new Book Project, "Between Two Mountains".

Over the past few years, I have personally learned the power of the human spirit and its resilience. The human spirit's desire is to survive... if not live.

There’s a big difference between surviving and living. The human spirit is not concerned with the quality of life, just life. The act of breathing and expressing.

It really doesn’t matter if that expression, which is manifested thru the personality is depression, mental illness, distorted of thoughts, anger, happiness, sadness, etc. The human spirit just wants to simply stay alive.

A positive note about the Human Spirit...
However, I do beleive it is a testament to the greatness of our Creator and His power to create within man a spirit that wills to survive.

My hope for you...

My hope for you is that you choose to LIVE and not just survive your challenges. Remember these things:

1. You must try and get out of bed. Dont go into seclusion. Go out and be around people. Even if its for short periods of time.

2. You must keep your mind and conversation as positive as you can. Make positive affirmations. Speak words that are empowering to your life. Positive self-talk really will help you.

3. Pray to God. So many of our challenging experiences seem to be out of our conrtol.Thats where anger comes in. Just pray and ask for divine guidance.

4. If you cant afford a therapist, find a confidant. An objective person that will support you. Embrace a friend that will allow you to be truthful about where you are, without judging you.

5. I know it is not easy to keep going when everything around you says, "stop". But take it from one who really knows...it came to pass.

Please focus on this... what you are experiencing right now is the place of your transition, its not permanent!

"I am standing with you, choose life."

Tyna T. Duncan

Tyna says, "This is great to affirm everyday."

2006-05-18T21:39:00.000-07:00
Excerpts from "Between 2 Mountains" Author, TYNA T. DUNCAN

Tyna says, "This is great to affirm everyday."

I will live...

I don’t want to worry about tomorrow or what is going to happen next year.

I will live for the day!

I will appreciate every day!

I will start today living a forgiveness – centered lifestyle.

But if I know a snake is a snake,

I will not put myself in harms way again.

Snakes bite.

Tyna T. Duncan

Tyna T Duncan's New Book Project..."Between 2 Mountains"

2006-05-16T15:28:00.000-07:00

Life is too short to hold on to anything that’s dying, costing you your peace or negatively impacting your life. I am learning it’s best to not try and hold things or people captive.

Just let it go free.

The first step to letting go is ...WANTING TO LET IT GO!

Thanks for spending time with my writings, Tyna!

How Did Tyna T. Duncan Survive???

2006-05-11T21:44:00.000-07:00

Excerpts from TYNA T. DUNCAN'S
NEW BOOK RELEASE,
TOTALLY OVERWHELMED.

How have I been able to bear or deal with all of this?

If God had not BEEN REAL in my life! I know that it was for my today ...thats why and how. If God had not given me the desire for his word and the desire to study and practice mind renewal, I knew I wouldn’t have made it. Because it’s in mind renewal that we grasp the engrafted word.

If our mind is not regenerate and we’re still thinking in terms of the flesh and we’re still thinking of what we see and there’s no faith and there’s no engrafting of that word into our spirit, we will be taken out . So I’m grateful that living a life where my mind was renewed helped me to stand. I guess I better tell what mind renewal is briefly.

Mind renewal is the process by which our minds are transformed from thinking in terms of the flesh and carnality... to thinking in terms of the word of God and what God says.

We stop hearing what man says and we start to say and start living and hearing and thinking and meditating on and developing the discipline of what God says.

Mind renewal is a process.

It is a lifestyle because we’re constantly being challenged by the things that we go through. And the situations that we find ourselves in whether we were the cause of those situations or whether somebody else was. By that I mean whether we did it, somebody else did it, or nobody else did it to us.

Thanks for stopping by. Keep Tyna's book project in your prayers!

Thanks, Lady Karen Turner!

2006-05-10T10:10:00.000-07:00

I thank God for friends and co-laborers in the vineyard, Tyna.

Lady KT writes...

Pastor Tyna,

Just wanted you to know that I have read most of your website. Your past has only set you up for a harvest of blessings for your future. The Lord used you in an AWESOME way this past weekend while with us. We will be in touch for a future date to come & speak for our Women's Ministries...

Will talk real soon and continue to share your testimony. Whoever reads it, will be blessed by it!

Lady Karen (Turner)
Author and First Lady
DELAWARE/PENNYSYLVANIA

Thank you, Lady KT...keep me in your prayers.

How do I live in this present moment?

2006-05-04T20:28:00.000-07:00

Excerpts from the new book..."Between Two Mountains"
Author Tyna T.Duncan

July 17, 2001
2am

How do I live in this present moment? All we ever have is this moment. It’s never an hour later. It’s never tomorrow. It’s never next month, next year or even 10 years from now. It’s always today, the current time, this year, this month…this present moment.

Coming to live in this present moment is a journey filled with discovery about the self, the world around, its self and the interaction between the self and the world around. This journey is filled with joy, pain, realities on multiple levels, relationships, happiness, tears, excitement, disappointments, exhilaration, depression, grief, love, hate, positives, negatives, anger, peace, tranquility, frustration, acceptances, rejections, successes, failures, event with all of these things flowing on the journey most of the trip is boring…meaningless alone. And what the hell does it all amount to?

What is the true value of discovery? For some it leads them to believe in nothing and no one. For others, its belief in an endless number of possibilities. What color is life? Is it one color or all the colors? Is it no color at all? And do you interpret the colors. What do you really see? Do we see what is really there or do we interpret what we bases upon experiences and baggage?

I’m sleepy.

"The Death Angel"

2006-04-27T12:42:00.000-07:00

EXCERPTS FROM..."Between Two Mountains"
Author, Tyna T. Duncan

It happened so suddenly. It was unexpected. I didnt know she was coming to visit our family. Not my family.

But then, she never lets anyone know she's coming because no on would welcome her in. We all would have said, "NO you dont belong here!"

But when the the angel does come, (thank God its not often) her visit leaves us feeling the most awful mix of emotions one could feel.

They say shes an angel...I wonder why?

Author, Tyna T.Duncan

Thanks! TTD

"To APPRECIATE... I had to EXPERIENCE"

2006-04-26T13:34:00.000-07:00

HERE'S A POEM FROM THE NEW BOOK PROJECT ENTITLED, "BETWEEN TWO MOUNTAINS" AUTHOR, TYNA T. DUNCAN

TO APPRECIATE PROSPERITY, I HAD TO EXPERIENCE POVERTY

TO APPRECIATE LOVE, I HAD TO EXPERIENCE HATE

TO APPRECIATE GAIN, I HAD TO EXPERIENCE LOSS

TO APPRECIATE LIFE, I HAD TO EXPERIENCE DEATH

TO APPRECIATE FAMILY, I HAD TO EXPERIENCE BEING ALONE

TO APPRECIATE OWNING A CAR, I HAD TO EXPERIENCE NO TRANSPORTATION

TO APPRECIATE A PLACE TO LIVE, I HAD TO EXPERIENCE BEING HOMELESS.

Author, Tyna T. Duncan

"But at that point, I have to put the CUFFS on you because it’s the law, Rev. Duncan."

2006-04-25T11:11:00.000-07:00

If you are enjoying the excerpts from Tyna T. Duncan's book, "Totally Overwhelmed", Pastor Tyna would love to hear from you! You can leave a comment on the link provided below! Thank You for stopping by!

More excerpts...

The procedure started out as pleasantly as it could for what it was, but it didn’t stay that way for long. A nice officer, he was an older white man, was responsible for escorting me to the jail house. Before walking out of the sheriff’s office he turned to me and said I’m not going to put you in handcuffs until we get ready to walk through the jail house door. But at that point I have to put the cuffs on you because it’s the law.

We walked from the police station through a short breezeway that lead to the jailhouse. I remember the air blowing up my navy blue skorts as I walked. It weather that day was cool but I was too preoccupied with what lie ahead of me to pay it much attention. We walked toward this giant gray steel door. The closer we got to it, the smaller I felt. It was huge. When we arrived at the door, the officer turned to me and said, I need to cuff you now. I held my arms out in front of me, never taking my eyes off the giant steel door. I heard a couple of clicks and then a slight pull at my wrists. I never looked down at the cuffs but I knew it was official. I was on my way to jail.

We walked through the steel door and approached a tall cement counter. There were two intake personnel, one white man and one black woman, standing behind the counter. The officer walked me to the front of the counter and turned me over to the intake personnel. I stood there for a moment as the officer and the intake personnel exchanged words. The officer then exited out the way we had entered and I stood watching them make what appeared to be an ID bracelet for me. The woman asked for the gold belt I was wearing and the navy blue shoe strings that were in my shoes. I gave them what they asked for without saying a word. I was too nervous to say anything. I knew they were taking the loose objects away from me because they could be used as harmful objects once inside the jail cell.

It took a couple of minutes and then the white intake person walked around the counter snatched my arms up over the counter and then let them fall against the counter concrete top so that the black woman could put the bracelet on me. I said nothing outwardly but I wanted to cry on the inside. The way he pulled my arms up and threw them up over that counter rubbing my wrists against those metal handcuffs and then letting them slam against that cement really hurt me. He showed no remorse for his roughness nor concern for how it made me feel. I swallowed, sucking in the pain, and scooted myself closer to the counter to accommodate for the awkward position I found myself in. Without realizing it I had placed my feet on these yellow foot markers painted on the cement floor. I was in the perfect position for what came next. The woman proceeded to search me, it wasn’t a strip search, but they did frisk me to verify I had no weapons or sharp objects in my possession.

Once the search was complete, the man used a remote to open this glass door that was about 10’ behind the intake counter. Almost immediately you could hear lot of screaming. I couldn’t decipher anything that was being said because the voices were coming from all directions.
It was very chaotic, all that screaming was. The intake woman walked me through the glass door and instructed I walked with her following the yellow feet on the floor. They led me to this big cell, about 15’x15’. Another glass door, the length of the cell, was opened. The hand cuffs were taken off of me and I was escorted in.

As I went into the cell I gazed the area, making myself aware of my surroundings. The floor, the seats, the wall - everything was cement. When I walked in there was a bench on the left and a bench on the right. There were two cement polls behind each bench. Towards the back of the cell there was a small brick wall. Behind this wall was the commode. There was a clock on the left hand side of the back wall.

It was early when I got there, probably around 11:00 AM. There were only three women in the cell. One woman sat on the bench, close to the glass door, on the left hand side. The other two women were sitting on the bench on the right hand side. I walked toward the bench on the left hand side of the cell and took a seat on the back end of it, close to the cement poll. As soon as I sat down, the girl that was sitting on the opposite end got up and went to the right side of the cell. I said nothing to her or gave her no indication that I didn’t want to sit by her. She just got up and moved. I fixed my eyes on the clock on the back wall. That clock was my focal point. It kept me concentrating on when I was getting out and kept me from starring at the other women in the cell.

As the day went on, more and more women came into the cell. I felt like I was in the devil’s inner sanctum. I had never before felt the spirits and the negativity and the evil that I felt in that place. The women in that cell were of various races and they were all in there for different reasons. They came into that cell one after the other, and gravitated to the right hand side. They came in cussing and threatening one another to the point in which I thought they were going to fight. Once about 15 women had piled up on the right side of the cell a woman that was either mentally ill or high off of some substance could no longer stay stretched out on the floor on that side of the cell. She came over to the side where I sat and resumed her position without even looking in my direction. The talking and arguing amongst the women continued but no other person came to my side of the cell and no one else that was in there at that time made an effort to speak to me. I sat in that same position for over six hours moving not one time.

The last two women that came into the cell while I was in there appeared to be a lesbian couple. They followed into the cell just like all the women before them, gravitating to the right hand side. Finally, what I would call the male of the couple came about half way over to the left hand side of the cell and said to me, “Ma’am, are you alright?” “You do not belong in here,” she said. Tears could have welled up in my eyes, but I thought of my parents and managed to contain myself, “I’m fine, thank you,” I said. Those were the only words I muttered the entire six hours I sat in that jail cell.

Talkin' 'bout OVERWHELMED!! Thanks for your comments! Tyna T. Duncan

I AM NOT AN ANGRY PERSON by nature.

2006-04-25T08:11:00.000-07:00

Excerpts from my book, "Totally Overwhelmed" Author Tyna T. Duncan

I am not an angry person by nature. Therefore I had no idea so much anger could reside in me. I had heard on the various news programs of how people go on killing sprees and perform destructive acts of vandalism but I never fully understood why. I never knew how powerful anger could be and what it could cause a person to do.

As I drove to Big E’s office at about 3:00 AM that Tuesday morning it seemed like thousands upon thousands of thoughts raced through my head. I had transitioned out of my professional, pastor role and had really started dealing with the personal side of things. My mind went back to the past. The same things he had done repeatedly for 20 plus years was happening again. While attending the church in Springfield, OH Big E had an affair with a very young woman there. The relationship became very public knowledge and the pastor sat everyone involved down. With all the stress and emotions that are involved in such a situation, I found myself in an altercation with the young woman on the church grounds. I snatched her up, reaching over some very small children to do so. The whole thing was just awful. It was awful for me because of my reaction. It was also awful for me because of the feeling of abandonment and betrayal that came along with the admittance of the affair. Even though he had admitted to the affair (and kept seeing her even after everyone knew) my father told me not to leave him because of the boys. Because of who my father was, Rev. Davis, I did not want to make our marriage and our family a public display. For those 2 important reason, I stayed. I made the decision to endure the relationship and all that came along with it. But I made it perfectly clear to him when I started the church that I could not allow stuff like that to continue. I distinctly remember telling him “if you feel like you’re gonna have an affair don’t have it in the church”!

You see, my father was one of the most well known civil rights leaders and pastors in our small city. Because of that, things I wanted to do I couldn’t because I had more than just my immediate family to consider. I had always been raised to be appropriate in public, to carry myself a certain way. It was definitely out of the question to act unseemingly because somebody’s was always watching. So I grew up always having to be reserved for the sake of the public. With this in mind and that fact that I had moved back to the city where my father was so prominent, I knew I had to handle things a certain way. Not fully knowing what was going on outside of my marriage, I didn’t always know how to respond to things. When I would get wind of things I would become very, very verbal. The verbal altercations would turn into fighting, physically fist fighting. I remember my breaking point. One night he had gone out and stayed out until 2 or 3 o’clock in the morning ( in Columbus seeing another woman).

I decided from that day forward that I didn’t want to battle with it anymore so I was just going to live with it. But living with it was only supposed to affect me, not the sheep God had entrusted in my care.
Big E was very clear on what my position as pastor was and what that required of him as my husband. These things were discussed because I was trying to be a good pastor and a protective shepherd. As a pastor and mother, I envisioned God’s sheep kind of like my babies. As their caretaker, both Big E and I had responsibilities surrounding them. Babies were expected to perform as babies. They would do things and say things and maybe even act in inappropriate ways but that’s what was expected of them. It was my job, to watch over them, to care for them, and to correct them. Knowing their situations and their vulnerable states did not give reason to manipulate the babies we were caring for. But that’s what he did.

He manipulated the situation and took advantage of a confused member of the church. He had mastered the art of the chameleon, entering into our congregation as a loving, concerned member when he was really a wolf in sheep’s clothing.

HEY, THANKS FOR READING!! MORE TO COME...
TYNA T. DUNCAN

Some Words of WISDOM...on the subject of CLOSURE!!

2006-03-21T14:45:00.000-08:00

Some Words of WISDOM...on the subject of Closure. Thanks Carla!!

Life is a collage of beginnings and endings that run together like still-wet paint. Yet before we can begin any new phase in life, we must sometimes first achieve closure to the current stage we are in. That's because many of life's experiences call for closure. Often, we cannot see the significance of an event or importance of a lesson until we have reached closure. Or, we may have completed a certain phase in life or path of learning and want to honor that ending. It is this sense of completion that frees us to open the door to new beginnings. Closure serves to tie up or sever loose ends, quiets the mind even when questions have been left unanswered, signifies the end of an experience, and acknowledges that a change has taken place.

The period of completion, rather than being just an act of finality, is also one of transition. When we seek closure, what we really want is an understanding of what has happened and an opportunity to derive what lessons we can from an experience. Without closure, there is no resolution and we are left to grieve, relive old memories to the point of frustration, or remain forever connected to people from our past. A sense of completion regarding a situation may also result when we accept that we have done our best. If you can't officially achieve closure with someone, you can create completion by participating in a closure ritual. Write a farewell letter to that person and then burn your note during a ceremony. This ritual allows you to consciously honor and appreciate what has taken place between you and release the experience so you can move forward.

Closure can help you let go of feelings of anger or uncertainty regarding your past even as you honor your experience - whether good or bad - as a necessary step on your life's path. Closure allows you to emotionally lay to rest issues and feelings that may be weighing down your spirit. When you create closure, you affirm that you have done what was needed, are wiser because of your experience, and are ready for whatever life wants to bring you next...Dont forget it, Tyna T. Duncan!!

Thoughts from the Diary of "Tyna T. Duncan"

2006-03-21T11:49:00.000-08:00

Entry date March, 1997…

I was thinking, when the man you love is unfaithful to you he really has decided to leave. To me, leaving your commitment is the same as you leaving, even if you stay. When this happens, you really feel helpless but you feel a lot of other emotions as well. Your emotions go crazy at first. You get angry. Then the anger turns to sadness. The sadness then causes you to feel hurt. The hurt causes confusion to manifest. The byproduct of all these emotions can be a multitude of things. Things like violent behavior, countermoves to hurt the other, drinking, getting high, crying, yelling, and screaming. All of these emotions lead back to the feeling of helpless which causes the cycle to begin again. In time, these emotions have long lasting effects on your character and you have to work really hard on not feeling as though they’ve become a permanent part of you. I did.

Thanks for stopping by!! BE BLESSED...

Tyna T. Duncan

REV. TYNA T. DUNCAN....“A Woman of Strength, Compassion and Faith”

2006-03-08T16:08:00.000-08:00

“A Woman of Strength, Compassion and Faith”

Rev. Tyna T. Duncan, the daughter of the late Reverend Curtis F. and Hattie Davis, was born in Springfield, Ohio. She has two sons, Ernest III and Jeremy Alan and one grandson, Jeremy Alan, II. She currently resides in Smyrna, Georgia.

An anointed musician, vocalist, and recording artist, Evangelist Duncan began singing at the age of two at Highlight Baptist Church, Pastored by her father. Tyna T. Duncan accepted Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior in 1972. Some years later, she accepted the call to the ministry as an Evangelist. She traveled extensively, evangelizing for eight years before becoming the Founder and Senior Pastor of Testament Worship Center, Inc. in Cincinnati, Ohio. Evangelist Duncan was Senior Pastor for over 10 years.

Tyna has a Bachelor of Science Degree in Business Administration, with minors in Special Education and Finance. She has attended many training classes and has earned certificates in Church Growth, Evangelism and Church Administration from the Charles E. Fuller Institute of Church Growth and Evangelism.

Evangelism and outreach have been a hallmark of Tyna T. Duncan’s Ministry. She has founded several outreach ministries including: Testament Women’s Ministries, Testament Men’s Fellowship, In Touch, Inc., Destiny 2000, and Testament Kids.

Currently, Rev. Tyna is birthing a powerful and surely to be an effective organization called NAWM (The National Association of Women Ministers, Inc.). The mission of NAWM is to teach, train, and mentor women functioning at all levels of Christian Ministry and to provide the crucial support that better ensures satisfaction and longevity of service.

Tyna T. Duncan sees her nurturing spirit as her greatest strength. Her role as a mother to her two sons and surrogate mother to many others is the cornerstone of her life and the framework from which her many other roles flourish.

A gifted entrepreneur, Rev. Duncan has established and previously owned several day care centers, as well as an agency for the mentally retarded and developmentally disabled. She has previously owned and established The Eden House, a home for mentally challenged women.

Tyna is an anointed and powerful preacher and gifted teacher of the Word with a heart for the people of God and a desire to see God’s people become all that He created them to be in Christ. Many lives have been changed, and many souls saved as a result of her ministry.

She is a visionary, whose desire is simply to please God and to reach out to help improve our community. When asked where she sees herself in the next five years, she replies “Wherever God leads me; I’ve learned to take the limits off God.”

"EXPERIENCE IS A GOOD TEACHER!"

2006-03-01T14:42:00.000-08:00
HERE ARE SOME EXCERPTS FROM MY NEW BOOK, "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED" TYNA T. DUNCAN

Experience has taught me that God carefully orchestrates the inevitable events in our lives to shape us into His divine people in order to live out his perfect will for our lives. I find it amazing that we often live our lives not fully understanding His will. We live our lives feeling as though things are going according to plan until a devastating situation, situation’s I’d like to refer to as “9-1-1 situations,” happens. With the onset of such a situation, we eagerly question the decisions we’ve made sometimes thinking their the cause of those 9-1-1 situations. We question our position with God. It’s amazing to me that one phone call, one conversation, one trip, one visit, can alter what we think God’s plan for our life is. It’s amazing to me, yet it happens. I know it happens because it happened to me.

I knew towards the end of 1996 things in my life were changing. I had worked the previous 12 years on building my life. The various storms I survived, both spiritual and natural, shaped my life, creating the comfortable place I called my home. I was never lost in my triumph because of the winds of life that circled around me. Even during their quiet times, these winds served as a reminder of where I had been as well as what I had been through. Towards the end of 1996, life as I knew it was becoming less and less comfortable for me. The winds in my life had awakened and were beginning to blow. Past experiences made this feeling memorable. I recognized it and knew my life was on the verge of changing. I didn’t know how or when it was going to happen, I just knew that it would. And it did.

TYNA T. DUNCAN IS MY NAME AND THIS IS THE START OF MY JOURNEY!

"My Sons, I am so Sorry!"

2006-01-31T15:31:00.000-08:00
Excerpts from the book.."Totally Overwhelmed"
Author Tyna T. Duncan

My two sons were extremely devastated and seriously impacted by all of this. They were both at very crucial points in their growth and developmental. Jeremy was 14 yrs. old when it all started and Ernie was 18.

Jeremy was there for everything. Ernie was away at Prep School when things started in 97. Up until 1998, Jeremy appeared to have been handling everything pretty well. He played basketball at a High School in Cincinnati. It was an all boy’s school. 1997 was a good year for Jeremy certainly under the circumstances. But in ‘98, he started to show signs of where he really was, emotionally.

At the beginning of the '98 school year, conditioning for the basketball season started shortly thereafter. Jeremy had a history of chronic problems with his sinuses. I had been putting off his need to have another surgery for about a year. Prior to this, he had had about 4 sinus surgeries. By September of ’98, he was so sick that he had to have surgery, immediately.
During surgery the doctor found bone spurs on his nose and that his nose had been broken at some point in the past. So he had to go in and clean that out. The doctor let me know, at that point, that Jeremy would be in a lot of pain. And he was.

My ex-husband came to the hospital for the surgery and my understanding the court order… I could not come within so many feet of him. In other words, I couldn’t go near him. He knew that he had the upper hand on me.

I knew I had to leave his presence and he made it very clear that he was the one in control of this situation. When he came in Jeremy’s room before the surgery, I would just leave the room and walk back into the waiting room. I had to wait for him to come out before I could go back in to see about my son. The entire time we were in the hospital I am thinking…why is he here?

I don’t think his father’s primary concern was for Jeremy. That man took every opportunity he could to exercise his power over me… every chance he got. And this was another opportunity. He had little regard ever, as to how his need for revenge and his selfishness was affecting our sons.

I remember thinking…if he cared so much about Jeremy, why had he not given me a red cent to help to take care of him? Fro the time we separated to the time Jeremy turned 18 yrs old, I never received one dime of child support in any form. Not a penny.

My Ex-husband was ordered by the court to carry health insurance on Jeremy. That he did not honor. He was ordered to pay his school tuition. That he never paid. Yet he could come to the hospital and be so concerned. That was a show...but I never figured out who the show was for.then it came to me ..the nurse!

He always was more concerned about what people saw and what they thought… than the true substance of his relationships with his sons. It was more of what people saw and what it looked like than what it really was.

When Jeremy was released to go home, I went to get my car. The nurse and his father wheeled Jeremy down to the car. I remember the nurse was standing there as his father put Jeremy in the car. I’ll never forget. His father leaned over into the car and said to me, with so much sincerity, “Tyna, is there anything I can do?” Boy, I wanted to say… “Now, up until this point, you have not paid one cent of child support, you have not made a gesture, you did not want to pay child support, you did not on any level call me or ask me if you could help me with the boys in any way …..and for you to say that to me right now because this nurse…who is a complete stranger, is standing there”...All I did say to him was…”yes you can do something…close the door of my car and let me take by son home!”

It was something about that surgery and the pain Jeremy was in physically and emotionally that sent my son on a downward spiral.

More to come...keep reading!

Thanks for sharing my life and your time!! Tyna T. Duncan

Third Annual Essence Apostolic Network Conference 2006

2006-01-25T14:51:00.000-08:00

ESSENCE Of The Cross Ministries, Inc. presents the . . .

Third Annual Essence Apostolic Network Conference – 2006
MONROE, NORTH CARLOINA

”CONTINUING THE JOURNEY . . . TO SPIRITUAL & APOSTOLIC MATURITY”

Wednesday – Saturday
March 15-18, 2006

Services nightly 7:30PM
Workshops 6:00PM & 12 Noon

PRAYER BREAKFAST WILL BE HELD ON SATURDAY MORNING AT 9AM

“He gave some to be apostles, some to be prophets, some to be evangelist, some to be pastors and teachers, to prepare God’s people for works of service, so that the body of Christ may be built up until we all reach unity in the faith and in the knowledge of the Son of God and become mature, attaining to the whole measure of the fullness of Christ.” (Ephesians 4:11-13)

Conference Sponsor:
Dr. W. Kaye McDonald, PhD, MM, Sr. Pastor

FOR DETAILED CONFERENCE INFORMATION: drkayemcdonald@aol.com

Rev. Phyllis Slaymon, MM, Pastor of Evangelism

Call the Best Western Hotel located at 2316 Hanover Dr., Monroe, NC at 704-283-4746 for accommodations.

Please ask for “Essence of the Cross Group”
DBL occupancy(1 king or 2 queens): $53.95 + tax: Jr. Suite $64.00 - $68.00 + tax

Airport: Charlotte Douglas International

If you are in the Monore N.C. area... I pray you will come and be with us!!

I AM EXPECTING AN AWESOME MOVE OF GOD!

SEE YOU THERE...

TYNA T. DUNCAN

"The Police RAID my Brother's Home!"

2006-01-18T15:15:00.000-08:00
Hi, My name is Tyna T. Duncan. I wrote a book about 3 yrs of unbelievable tragedies that happen in my life!

Here are some excerpts from the book, "Totally Overwhelmed."

One morning around 10:00am, I received a phone call one day and all I heard was a woman screaming at the top of her lungs and crying. Once she calmed down enough for me to understand what she was saying, she kept chanting…”They got him, they got him, and they got him!” I realized that it was one of my brother’s feamle friends and she was talking about my brother... my only brother! At that moment, I thought she was telling me my brother was dead! And that someone had killed him.

I REMEMBER THINKING…”I only have one brother, the first thing I thought was, and he is dead. But she said,” no he’s not dead.” She went on to say, “the police came into his house while they were sleeping and raided the property!” She continued by saying, "Tyna, they have taken your brother to jail.”

Here I was again….Dealing with another tragedy and another devastating situation.

Between the time that my Mother passed away and this point, my relationship with my brother had rapidly changed. We became closer than we had ever been. It was largely because of our Mother’s death. My brother loved my Mother and he was dealing with her death. Both of us were having some very serious issues, depression and we were totally grief stricken. Because of the suddenness of her death, my brother felt he did not have the opportunity to say good bye. He was so close to her.

When Mommie died, we started spending a lot of time together. We played cards, started going skating on Sunday evenings, we spent most major holidays including our Mother’s birthday together with our children. We made up our own new traditions as well. Our relationship as brother and sister had been renewed.
So, you can imagine, when I received the phone call from my brother, I felt like the last pieces of my foundation, the one person in my life that I knew loved me and that I knew love from my first family, was about to leave me too.

After I hung up the phone, I immediately jumped in my car and drove to my brother’s home in our home town. I had never in my life seen anything like this…. not even in movies or on television. In all the movies I have seen when the police go into a house and tear everything up looking for evidence …I had never seen anything like what I experienced in my brother’s home.

When I arrived at his home, I saw the police had kicked the front door down. I walked into this house and they had trashed the entire house! The house looked as if a tornado had blown through it. The police left and left the house open.

I ended up staying (because I didnt sleep) in that house without a door on it that night. I could not find one contractor that day, who was not afraid to come to this raided house to put the door back up.

Thanks for allowing me to sharing my life with you!!

Tyna T. Duncan

"I couldn't believe it..POLICE RAID MY BROTHER'S HOME!"

2006-01-18T13:01:00.000-08:00

One morning around 10am, I received a phone call. On the other end of the phone, I heard a woman screaming at the top of her lungs and crying. Once she calmed down enough for me to understand what she was saying, she kept chanting…”They got him, they got him, and they got him!” I realized that it was one of my brother’s friends and she was talking about my brother... my only brother. At that moment, I thought she was telling me my brother was dead! And that someone had killed him.

I REMEMBER THINKING…”I only have one brother, the first thing I thought was, and he is dead. But she said,” no he’s not dead.” She went on to say, “the police came into his house while they were sleeping and raided the property!” She continued by saying, Tyna, they have taken your brother to jail.”

Here I was again….Dealing with another tragedy and another devastating situation.

Between the time that my Mother passed away and this point, my relationship with my brother had rapidly changed. We became closer than we had ever been. It was largely because of our Mother’s death. My brother loved my Mother and he was dealing with her death. Both of us were having some very serious issues, depression and we were totally grief stricken. Because of the suddenness of her death, my brother felt he did not have the opportunity to say good bye. He was so close to her.

When Mommie died, we started spending a lot of time together. We played cards, started going skating on Sunday evenings, we spent most major holidays including our Mother’s birthday together with our children. We made up our own new traditions as well. Our relationship as brother and sister had been renewed.

So, you can imagine, when I received the phone call from my brother, I felt like the last pieces of my foundation, the one person in my life that I knew loved me and that I knew love from my first family, was about to leave me too.

After I hung up the phone, I immediately jumped in my car and drove to my brother’s home in our home town. I had never in my life seen anything like this…. not even in movies or on television. In all the movies I have seen when the police go into a house and tear everything up looking for evidence …I had never seen anything like what I experienced in my brother’s home.

When I arrived at his home, I saw the police had kicked the front door down. I walked into this house and they had trashed the entire house! The house looked as if a tornado had blown through it. The police left and left the house open.

I ended up staying (because I didnt sleep) in that house without a door on it that night. I could not find one contractor that day, who was not afraid to come to this raided house to put the door back up.

More excerpts from "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED"
Author, Tyna T. Duncan

Thanks for stopping by!

"Holding on to my Sanity by a Thread!"

2006-01-11T13:11:00.000-08:00

Hi, I'm Tyna T. Duncan. I wrote a book entitled, "Totally Overwhelmed".

Here are a few excerpts from the book...Enjoy!

I was trying my best to hold onto my sanity. And I was only holding on, by a thread. It so overwhelming that I felt as if every would bring more devastation and tragedy. Getting out of bed at this point was very difficult. Some days I didn’t get up. Every time I tried to pull myself together enough to grasp what all was happening to me…....something else would happen. And it did!

One morning around 10:00am, I received a phone call one day and all I heard was a woman screaming at the top of her lungs and crying. Once she calmed down enough for me to understand what she was saying, she kept chanting…”They got him, they got him, they got him!” I realized that it was one of my brother’s friends and she was talking about my brother... my only brother. At that moment, I thought she was telling me that my brother was dead! And that someone had killed him.

More excerpts to come from the book, "Totally Overwhelmed" .. Author, Tyna T. Duncan.

Thanks for stopping by, Tyna.

"YOU CAN ARISE FROM THE ASHES OF YOUR LIFE... TO LIVE AGAIN!"

"no mo money, honey!"

2005-12-28T15:40:00.000-08:00

HERE ARE MORE EXCERPTS FROM THE BOOK,
"TOTALLY OVERWHELMED"
Author Tyna T. Duncan

In January of 1998, I started experiencing serious financial problems because the businesses had closed and the membership at church had declined. The banks and all of my vendors had all began suing me.

Church owned property that we bought but was principal co-signer also had 4 or 5 other cosigners went into foreclosure and repossession. The building was going to go into foreclosure so the bank had notified these cosigners of the situation with the building. They all in turn sued me as well. But everybody was suing me. There were so many law suits being filed that the sheriff, the rep from the sheriff’s office was coming in the morning and the afternoon. One afternoon he just asked me, “Rev, is it ok if I just come in the afternoon and I’ll bring the ones from the morning too? He came to my home so often; the sheriff knew the dog and they were on a first name basis.

I remember leaving town and when I returned, there was a very large official looking document on my front door. One of the banks had gotten a court order to come into my home. The bank officials went through the entire place and took everything they could resell. They took my personal things from my fur coats, leather coats, jewelry, computers, and electronics. They even took some of my
son’s personal belongings and his electronics as well.

"You can Arise from the Ashes of your Life and Live Again!!"

MORE EXCERPTS FROM THE BOOK,"TOTALLY OVERWHELMED" tomorrow...

Thanks for stopping, Tyna!

"DADDY, PLEASE DONT LEAVE ME!"

2005-12-28T14:45:00.000-08:00

More excerpts from
"TOTALLY OVERWHELMED"
Author, Tyna T. Duncan

October of 1997

My mother died in January of 1997. When Mommie died, I think my father, the Reverend C.F. Davis, realized how much he missed her and loved her. After 54 years of marriage, I think the separation from Mommie was more difficult than he expected it would be.

My father had arthritis all of my life. I received a phone call from my Aunt telling my father had been admitted into to the hospital because his arthritis had totally crippled him… all at once. Daddy never recovered. I remember going to the hospital in Springfield, my home town every other day. I drove that 90 sometimes everyday to see about him. I remember thinking.”He is all I have left”. This was one of the loneliest periods of my life. It was difficulty to see him in that state. He was unable to move or even feed himself. He was totally incapacitated!

My fathers had always been so strong and so in charge all of his life. But now he was totally dependent yet his mind was as sharp as it ever was. That was very hard for me to take. I cant image what he was experiencing. But he was always his normal upbeat and funny self! I remember one Saturday night going to Springfield. I cried from the point I stepped off the elevator until I got to threshold of his hospital room door. I wiped my tears away and I knew, at that point, that he was not going to live long. I knew when we put him in the nursing home that he was not going to endure living this way for long. I wanted to say..."Daddy, please dont leave me."

So, my Daddy died the end of February, 1998.

I believe it was an Epicurean that said, “it is in adversity that we come face to face with who we really are”. We discover our maturity level and our spiritual growth as individuals. And I too... came face to face with myself.

Does this sounds like a soap opera to you? If it doesn't yet, just keep reading, man! LOL!! "Totally Overwhelmed" would make a great screen play (MOVIE)!! Tell me what you think..leave me a comment.

More excerpts from "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED" Author, Tyna T. Duncan

THANKS FOR STOPPING BY..TYNA

"Women as Prey!" Does that man mean you any good???

2005-12-22T16:45:00.000-08:00

More excerpts to come from the book, "Totally Overwhelmed".. Author, Tyna T. Duncan

I think women have to be careful. Just because men come dressed in the right package that doesn't mean they are any good for us.

We women end up falling in love with an image of a man but that is not really what we see. And certainly if you are in a situation where you are vulnerable, such as, youre going through a devastating relationship, maybe a bad marriage, or coming out of a divorce, having financial problems, or lost everything, maybe youre with a lot of guilt, or a family member has died. THERE ARE A LOT OF OTHER SITUATIONS BESIDES THE ONES I MENTIONED THAT LEAVE US VULNERABLE and EASY MARKS FOR MEN WHO PREY ON WOMEN!

Women need to be careful because men who are cons artists can see that even though we may not see it in ourselves. We may feel that we are in control, but we really are not!

Men like that are professionals. They study women. They know women. They know what makes us tick, what makes us happy, what makes us sad and they do just enough to engage us. They say the right things. They do just enough to get the woman's attention and to gain her to trust. They will even promise to marry you. Some even will marry you! But most have wives all over the country! THEY WILL TELL YOU WHAT THEY KNOW YOU WANT TO HEAR!

Please Women be aware...in a lot of cases getting a social security number or ID on them and running a check, that dont mean anything because if theyre professionals! They have done this for a living! Men that prey on women know how to get clean social security numbers and other forms of ID. These men go from city to city and state to state securing new IDs that are clean.

By clean IDs I mean, they can get numbers and names that dont show a background of criminal activity or adverse information. And most of the time they do not use their real names. They dont use their real identities. So to say that you can see them coming thats not always the case. Many of those type men have done this for years.

So if you have a funny feeling about him. Or if there is something about this wonderfull man you just met...there probably is something funny about him. WOMEN WE MUST BEWARE OF THE TYPE OF PERSON HE MOST LIKELY IS.

Thanks for stopping by, Tyna.

More excerpts to come from the book, "Totally Overwhelmed".. Author, Tyna T. Duncan.

"YOU CAN ARISE FROM THE ASHES OF YOUR LIFE... TO LIVE AGAIN!"

Its a SOAP OPERA if I ever read one!!

My experience with a man....."America's Most Wanted".

2005-12-22T15:08:00.000-08:00

MORE EXCERPTS FROM THE BOOK,"TOTALLY OVERWHELMED"

"America's Most Wanted" as I called him.....

This man came into my life around May. 1997. Right at the point when I was most vulnerable....yes, you know where I'm going with this!

He was very charismatic. He was a preacher. Dag-gone-it, he was a criminal and a preacher. He had criminal intent too. I do not really understand what his objectives with me were or what he had in mind when he first met me but I know that whatever he intended, it did not end up that way. He ended up falling in love with me where as I really did not fall in love with him. His personality was very charismatic, very warm, very sensitive, and boy was he a lot of fun. I had so much fun with him. He catered to me. What ever I wanted to do, where ever I wanted to go or have... thats what happened. He was so sensitive to my needs! He thought he was a Don Juan.

America's Most Wanted traveled to Cincinnati and then he'd leave town, go to another city to preach or/and to see some other woman. I dont know where all he traveled.. but I know he traveled across country like a truck driver. Oddly enough, he would always come back to be with me.

I was never in denial about who he was and the kind of man he was. I allowed him a comfort level of telling me the truth about who he was. I did not play games with him from a standpoint of thinking he was something he wasn't. It was very clear, crystal clear. BOY was he a lot of fun! He was just a criminal and I said it to his face all the time. He always just laughed. I accept him for who he really was. that caused him to become endeared to me.

I will never forget this and this was real funny. He was not an attractive man but his personality and his character made him attractive.

He took me every where. In the USA and out. But I knew I could not continue living like this. I knew I was only escaping my totally overwhelming life. I made one very serious mistake with him. It has been very hard for me to forgive myself.

But you have to BUY THE BOOK to find out!!

Thanks for stopping by, Tyna.

More excerpts to come from the book, "Totally Overwhelmed".. Author, Tyna T. Duncan.

"YOU CAN ARISE FROM THE ASHES OF YOUR LIFE... TO LIVE AGAIN!"

Totally losing touch with reality....

2005-12-19T01:33:00.000-08:00

More excerpts from "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED" Author, Tyna T. Duncan

April,1997... only 4 months into 1997....

I was losing touch with my life and I think back now on that period.... I have very little recall of these events from a day to day. I was drinking Kendall Jackson chardonay, just trying to get through the day. I was not sleeping. I was so sleep deprived that my short term memory was impaired. Not communicating with anyone – I really just cut myself off from reality – from society. I think back and I think my poor youngest son. I don’t even know if he was going to school. I didn't know if he was going to school every day, and if he was going on time. I was completely out of touch with reality.

Looking back and being out of touch as I look back brought a level of guilt as well because of the things that happened.

I’m not sure how all of this was affecting my sons – my youngest son who was home. My oldest son was still away in prep school.

Leave me a comment....excerpts from "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED" Author, Tyna T. Duncan

What happened to ...THE TESTAMENT WORSHIP CENTER?

2005-12-15T14:07:00.000-08:00

More excerpts from the Book,
"TOTALLY OVERWHELMED", AUTHOR YOUR TRULY, TYNA. T. DUNCAN.

I was Pastor of THE TESTAMENT WORSHIP CENTER.

I was Senior Pastor of the Testament Worship Center(TWC) in Cincinnati, Ohio. I founded TWC in January of 1989. With only my husband and two young sons. We held Bible Study in my dining room at home prior to finding and being able to afford to pay rent. No one but a faith believer would start a church the dead of winter..but I did.

The atmosphere in the church was awesome. It was truly a special place to worship God. We all were all excited about what God had allowed us to build. The presence of God was in every service and every gathering. Even at the annual church picnics during which we always had a water battle and a volleyball competition where the women played the men. (They always beat us terribly and kept the trophy. But we gave the men a short run for their money!! We as members of the church could feel the love of God throughout the entire membership. TWC was a real family that worshipped together but who also experienced TRUE fellowship and relationship! I characterize Testament Worship Center as a Camelot moment.

From the church inception the membership grew very rapidly. At one point we were breaking all church growth standardized averages. And lets not forget I was a female Pastor. So that put me in the category of being a minority in a male dominated profession living. Plus Cincinnati is a very traditionally religious city that did not support women as Pastors. Within 5 years, TWC purchased several properties. In 1994, the church moved into a multi-million dollar facility! It was a 25,000 square foot facility that needed a little work.

By the end of 1996, we had remodeled most of the facility with the exception of my office. The church auditorium/ sanctuary seated 800. The facility had lots of office space, a large fellowship hall and wonderfully functional commercial kitchen, newly remodeled educational wing, daycare facilities for childcare center, the churched own two houses which were on the church property and much more. It was just a wonderful property with tons of possibilities. And I was in process of carrying out my plan to create a synergistic strategic plan which would be a blessing to the community and that would provide much needed services and ministries the members of the church would have access to. Thats the top line.

Prior to the events of January, 1997, the church had entering a church growth mode. But around mid February,1997, the church attendance and membership started a major decline. The people started leaving the church and as members would leave those members would call those who were still members to influence them to leave as well.
and for a while the attendance plummeted from 500 to about 100 until it leveled off at about 40-50 people attending on Sundays.

I couldn't believe all this was happening to me and not all at one time! I was TOTALLY OVERWHELMED because my mother was died, my marriage was over, my church membership is declining, my businesses looking at possible closes, my income/finances decreasing down, I was facing going to prison of up to 18 years, ex-members of the church turning their back on me, the banks and vendors and creditors calling me, and this is just the tip of the iceburg!

Thanks for stoppong to share my life! Tyna T. Duncan

Does this sounds like a soap opera to ya yet??? If it doesn't, just keep reading, man! LOL "Totally Overwhelmed" would make a great screen play(MOVIE)!! What do you think?? Leave me a comment!

"You can Arise from the Ashes of your Life and Live Again!!"
Tyna T.

TYNA T. DUNCAN HAS A LIGHTER SIDE.."I met a man!"

2005-12-14T15:15:00.000-08:00

FROM MY LIGHTER SIDE...

From my lighter writing style, "I met a man"
You can go to:
http://www.bloglines.com/blog/mymomaggie OR
http://spaces.msn.com/members/tynatduncanspeaks/

December 14, 2005
"I met a man.... at BP gas station"
By mymomaggie

Well here is another one of my AGGIE experiences With MEN!!( I'm single for now!!) LOL

A few weeks ago I was blogging on my computer (talkin to yawl) and I got tired of sitting in front of my computer. I needed gas, so just threw on a baseball hat turned of the VH1 program, I was watching, jumped in my mo'chine(that's a car) and took off for BP.

I have to tell you...I was looking so crazy. I really should not have been IN my house lookin that bad...let alone, going out of my house to buy gas. I looked in the rear view mirror on the way there and I scared my own self, jack!! ...if its not funny laugh anyway! LOL!!

But, nevertheless (let me act like I have good sense, even if I don't) I live in Atlanta off of Cobb Parkway so I went on up the hill. When.... Oh, where was I...Oh yea, I got to the BP I looked at the price of the gas...thats when it was still real expensive...And I got out of the car and I just screamed. Not real loud, even though my sons say I'm loud..but they don't know me that well!! I screamed softly when I saw the price of gas. LOL!!

I have a small Hyndai so it doesn't take more that 10 gallons of gas. As it was filling up, the price kept going up and up. So I started fussin' at the pump..Little did I know, someone on the other side of the pump had been listening to me the whole time!! YOU TALKIN' EMBARRASSED!! No I wasn't! GOTCHA!!

Well...all of a sudden, I heard this voice say, "You're complaining about your gas bein' expensive..I was going to ask you to buy mines too. Then he stepped to the side so I could see him...You know where I am going with this right..NO YOU don't. He was not 6 foot 5 inches tall dark and handsome...he as short, bald and OLD!!

More tomorrow..GOTCHA AGAIN!!

"Aggie" AKA Tyna T. Duncan

"Aggie" is my oldest son's (Ernie) nickname for me!

Excerpts from the book, "Totally Overwhelmed," Author, Tyna T. Duncan

2005-12-14T12:34:00.000-08:00

TOTALLY VUNERABLE!!

I remember going to my therapist at the onset of my court ordered therapy… of which I had to pay for. My therapist, who was blind, would always say to me, “Tyna, this is so hard for me to believe. It’s almost as if you’re in the Lion’s Den of the Fiery Furnace.” I knew he was at a lost initially. For a long while, months even, he would just listen to me talk and he never made to many comments. He’d just let me talk and talk and talk. One thing he would suggets on-going was…”you just need to get away…just get away, Tyna. Go on a short trip for two or three days… just to get away from all this.” I think my situation made HIM feel, Totally Overwhelmed!
(Just a little humor) :-)

I was Totally VUNERABLE..........
It’s something … when we experience major negative events, many times, we’re not aware that we’re vulnerable. We are not aware that we really aren’t normal and that we are not thinking clearly. And its even worse when we are sleep deprived! Sleep deprived means you’re tired, a thousand things are on your mind, you’re in the depths of depression, and you’re very vulnerable even though you don’t feel that you are. I felt fine. I felt “everything is ok and I’m handling things fine.” But the reality of the situation was I was FAR from fine!! I was very, very vulnerable and open for any and everything that could possibly happen…and that is just what did!

More tommorrow..

Does this sounds like a soap opera to you? If it doesn't yet, just keep reading, man! LOL "Totally Overwhelmed" would make a great screen play(MOVIE)!!

Tyna. T. Duncan

SOMETHING NEW JUST FOR YOU!!

2005-12-12T11:41:00.000-08:00

Here is how you can be a MEMBER of a Prayer Group that gets RESULTS!!

IF YOU DESIRE:
~REALIZED PROSPERITY IN YOUR LIFESTYLE!
~MANAFESTED HEALINGS AMD DELIVERANCE IN YOUR AND YOUR LOVED ONES LIVES...

PRAYER IS THE FIRST STEP!!
The first law of prosperity and healing is the law of prayer. This involves invoking the help of our creator to help you manifest your healing and prosperity. Praying with others gives strength to any prayer.

If you follow "THE JABEZ PRAYER GROUP" you could have thousands of prosperity and healing seekers praying for you as you pray for them. There is nothing wrong with asking for money or material things all of our healing and prosperity emanates from our creator. He wants us to be prosperous and be in divine health. If we ask the Lord we will receive.

Think outside the BOX!! Think OUTSIDE the box!!! THINK outside the box!!

THIS IS NO GAME!! WE MUST EMPLOY NEW METHODS BUT SAME MESSAGE, NEW EXPRESSIONS OF FAITH OUT OF THE SAME FOUTAIN, NEW FRESH ANOINTED MEANS TO REACH THE THRONEROOM OF HEAVEN!!

YOU DONT HAVE BE A FAILURE IN LIFE...LET'S LEARN TO STAND TOGETHER IN PRAYER!!

be blessed and let's pray....TYNA T. DUNCAN

"IS FEAR GOOD OR BAD??" REAL RELATIONSHIP

2005-11-30T07:41:00.000-08:00

Remember these things about fear.....

1. Fear is a basic instinct for living creature.

2. Fear is a natural response when our physical safety and psychological well-being is threatened.

3. Fear is learned and vital for our survival.

4. Phobias are irrational fears.

5. Fear is different from anxiety and panic.

6. Legitimate fear has on OBJECT.

7. Legitimate fear has two attributes.
IMMINENT (present) and POTENT (powerful)

"WHERE ARE YOU LIVING AND HOW IS FEAR EFFECTING YOUR LIFE?"

IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE ADDED TO MY PRAYER JOURNAL, LEAVE ME A PRAYER REQUEST AT tynatduncan@gmail.com.

FOR INFORMATION ON HOW TO PURCHASE A COPY OF MY BOOK, "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED", SEND ME AN EMAIL AT tynatduncan@gmail.com.

"STAY BLESSED AND BE A BLESSING TO SOMEONE IN NEED...DO A KIND DEED TODAY!"
Here is how you can be a MEMBER of a Prayer Group that gets RESULTS!!
IF YOU DESIRE:
~REALIZED PROSPERITY IN YOUR LIFESTYLE!
~MANIFESTED HEALINGS AND DELIVERANCE IN YOUR AND YOUR LOVED ONES LIVES...

PRAYER IS THE FIRST STEP!!
The first law of prosperity and healing is the law of prayer. This involves invoking the help of our creator to help you manifest your healing and prosperity. Praying with others gives strength to any prayer.

If you follow "THE JABEZ PRAYER GROUP" you could have thousands of prosperity and healing seekers praying for you as you pray for them. There is nothing wrong with asking for money or material things all of our healing and prosperity emanates from our creator. He wants us to be prosperous and be in divine health. If we ask the Lord we will receive.

Think outside the BOX!! Think OUTSIDE the box!!! THINK outside the box!!

THIS IS NO GAME!! WE MUST EMPLOY NEW METHODS BUT SAME MESSAGE, NEW EXPRESSIONS OF FAITH OUT OF THE SAME FOUNTAIN, NEW FRESH ANOINTED MEANS TO REACH THE THRONEROOM OF HEAVEN!!

YOU DON'T HAVE BE A FAILURE IN LIFE...LET'S LEARN TO STAND TOGETHER IN PRAYER!!

Prayer Day November 26, 2005 is here!

2005-11-22T22:03:00.000-08:00

"A day
that will.....
change your LIFE!!"

PLEASE COME AND BE MY GUEST!

DATE: Saturday, November 26, 2005
TIME: 9AM TO 3PM

PLACE: WORD OF DELIVERANCE
11331 SOUTHLAND BLVD
CINCINNATI, OHIO

FOR INFO: 513-956-9556

GUEST INCLUDE:
PASTOR ROBERT and JAMILA LYONS, JR are the Pastors of The Faith Church in Dayton, Ohio. They are gifted teacher-preachers, prayer intercessors and they possess a powerful prophetic word.

PASTOR BETTY JO SOMERVILLE is an powerful prayer intercessor and Pastor in Covington, Kentucky.

Minister Pat Bray is the head prayer intercessor at the Greater Grace Apostolic Church in Springfield, Ohio.

Rev. N. Louise Sims is the Ohio chairwoman for the National Association of Women Ministers. Her gifted calling is in the area of Spiritual Inner Healing and has extensive training and certifications in the area of Theophostics, which a God-given approach to healing and wholeness. She is on the ministerial staff of Dunamis Ministries in Cincinnati, Ohio.

Pastor Stephanie Dubuois is the Ohio District 1 (Southern and Central Ohio) chairwoman for the National Association of Women Ministers. She is anointed in the areas of prayer intercession, evangelism and church administration. She is on the ministerial staff of Dunamis Ministries in Cincinnati, Ohio.

Pastor Ruby Segar-Vonner is an anointed prayer warrior and missionary evangelist. She is a member of the (A.W.A.R.E.) Anointed Women Anxious to Each Everyone Prayer Troupe. She is an Associate Pastor of the New Commandment Christian Fellowship Church in Norwood, Ohio.

Lady Brenda Sims is a end-time evangelist and prayer intercessor on the move for God. She is a minister and member at the Zion Temple Apostolic Church in Cincinnati, Ohio.

Psalmist Joel Buckner, a heavenly tenor voice given to us in the earth to enjoy and experience in Worship! In addition to being an anointed, accomplish singer, Joel has achieved notable success in the workplace.

Rev. Brenda Wallace is the senior worship leader at the Maranatha Christian Church in Dayton, Ohio. She is known and regarded across the country as one of God's General's in the area of Praise and Worship.

AND I, Tyna T. Duncan, WILL BE THERE AS WELL....SO YOU DON'T WANT TO MISS YOUR BLESSING..... THIS COMING SATURDAY, NOVEMBER 26 AT THE WORD OF DELIVERANCE CHURCH!

I'll see you there! Bring your prayer requests and a friend!!

REMEMBER: PRAYER + PRAISE = POWER!!

Tyna, TOTALLY at a loss...........

2005-11-14T21:24:00.000-08:00

MORE EXCERPT FROM MY BOOK, "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED"

My family was close and communicated frequently, we had a series of codes we used to keep each other informed about things that were going on or things that needed to be discussed. We all had pagers and used them to communicate these codes: 711 -"urgent so call me when you can", 811- "it's very importantly call me now", and 911- "someone is dead". About 4:30, I received a page from my brother, who lived in Springfield, OH, our home town. He paged me 911 so I knew someone had died. Because my father was so much older than my mother I immediately thought that it was my father that had died. So I called his house and received no answer. I proceeded to dial my parent's house and a strange man answered the phone. I identified myself and as callously as a stranger, could tell another stranger, that fireman told me my mother had died.

My mother's death took me into another level of not only depression but unbelief and shock. So I got my clothes on and Big E, Jeremy and myself went to Springfield. We went straight to the funeral home. I called the Funeral Director, who was a life long friend, and asked him not to do anything to her until after I came see her. So we walked in the office of the funeral home and there my Mommie lay with a big brown mink blanket resting over her entire body. Only her head was visible to sight. Her glasses were laying on top of the mink blanket She looked so peaceful. I couldn't believe she was dead! She couldn't have been. But when I touched her, she was cold. Everything happened so unexpectedly.

One phone call, one message from a complete stranger, one major devastating experience changed life as I knew it.... forever. I was told she fell dead in the kitchen, on the kitchen floor. She had no signs of pain or suffering. She had no signs of a stroke or heart attack.

That whole week I was in Springfield. It just seemed like my whole life had been suspended and the Tyna I knew was no longer apart of this life but was in another, watching the horrific events of someone else's life. I remembered her always saying to me, when I die, "I want you to make me look like a queen." I did just that. The wake and funeral were on January 31, 1997. It was a Friday evening. I was sitting there in the funeral, at Mt. Zion Baptist Church in Springfield, OH, seemingly emotionless. My mother raised us to always be appropriate. If there were any emotions that you needed to show you did that privately not publicly. So in keeping with the way I had been raised, I sat there looking at her as she lay peacefully in the casket Prior to this ..I when to my personal shopper at Dilliard's in Cincinnati,Ohio and she was so wonderful to me and my friend that when with me, Sheila. I told her I wanted a white textured suit and she bought me several designer 2 piece wonderful garments. My choice was a Albert Nipon white textured 2 piece suit with rhinestone buttons down the front, rhinestone post earrings, and a small very tasteful rhinestone necklace, (white nylon footies and white satin house shoes which no one saw). But I knew she had them on.

Up until this point I had not been able to show how was feeling, so because I really felt so much pain it scared me when I would allow myself to feel. At one point during the funeral I said to him my youngest son go and look and see if that is Honey (they called her Honey) in the casket. I could not believe it was her. And I remember them rolling her out of that funeral and we walked behind the casket. By the time we made it to the door, my brother had his arm around my waist. By the time we made to the exit door, By brother was literally caring me because my knees just buckled up and could not walk. And Frank kept saying to me, you can make it. We are almost there, baby sister.

My father, Reverend Curtis F. Davis, was a pastor(The Highlight Baptist Church) in our home town but due to the number of people we were expecting, we had to have the funeral in the largest black church, Mt. Zion Baptist Church in Springfield, OH. There were close to 1000 people that came. There was a line 2 blocks down the street and around the corner waiting to view my Mother's corpse. I believe that was a testament to the way my mother lived her life.

The next day we when to the cemetery for the commital. The hardest thing in the world for me was leaving my mother in that cemetery. I knew that her spirit was no longer there and her soul was gone but it was so cold that day and the thought of leaving her there in that cemetery was very hard and very difficult for me. So now I have to deal with my Mother's death and possibly going to jail for 16 years. I was charged with 2 counts of arson and I was looking at a possible 8 years for each of the offenses. Time went on. I was not eating at that point, not sleeping and totally grief stricken.
I AM STOPPING HERE FOR NOW....

Hi, I hope you are finding my book interesting as well as unbelievable because it was truly Overwhelming! But keep reading..Its just beginning!

TO PURCHASE YOUR OWN COPY AND READ THE BOOK AT YOUR LEISURE, EMAIL ME AT tynat259@yahoo.com for the details.

Remember.."THERE'S NOTHING TOO HARD FOR GOD!"

TYNA'S thoughts on.... "Overwhelming Emotions"

2005-11-14T15:40:00.000-08:00

"THE FIRST IS PRAYER!"

Please leave me your thoughts in the comments!! If you have a loved one or friend who is overwhemed you can send them this blog!!

Thanks...I'm here to HELP, Tyna.

Check these sites out...

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www.yourmedicalguide.com/Anxiety

Anxiety in women-- Causes, symptoms and natural relief
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www.womentowomen.com/ depressionanxietyandmood/anxiety.asp

Women's Health: Anxiety Disorders
Though people experiencing anxiety sometimes prefer to attribute their symptoms
... One research group found that 48.5% of women with an anxiety disorder in ...
www.thedoctorwillseeyounow.com/ articles/womens_health/anxiety_8/

THE DEATH OF MY MOTHER...NO!!!

2005-11-13T18:56:00.000-08:00

More excerpts from "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED"....

When I got home I got in the shower. I was in the shower for three or four hours. I was in the shower so long my youngest son came to the bathroom door and said mom please come out of the shower. Eventually I got out of the shower and I got in bed. I didn't talk for over two days. I was so depressed and so, it was as if I was having an out of body experience. My oldest son would come in and he'd just pray with me and stay in the room with me. Apparently he got concerned because I wouldnt talk and he called our Senior Deacon. I am so grateful for that. I will never forget him coming into my bedroom, kneeling down beside my bed and praying for me. He kneeled down and the Sr. Deacon, he was married to our Sr. Deaconess so she was the one who had gone with me Lady X's home. So she knew what was going on. (Joe and Evie, if you are reading this book, I want you to know I thank you and I will always be grateful for you and all you did for me during that period.)

When I decided to speak, one of the first things I did was ask Big E to move out of the house and he did. That Friday I called the attorney. We had to go to the attorneys office and as I said before he was from my home town so he knew our family and our family history. When we got there the lady ushered us into the conference room and shortly thereafter he came in with a tape recorder. He came in the room, sat down, and hit the button on the tape recorder. All that could be heard was my voice threatening my husband, over and over and over again. They were the messages I had left him the night all this began. My attorney stopped the tape and began to talk to my ex-husband about how all this began. Big Ernie said the whole incident started because of the accusation that someone - a young woman in the church had accused him of having an affair but it was a lie. He went on to say it just showed his whereabouts and proved he did not commit the incident. My attorney told us what he wanted to do. He wanted to go to trial.

Later on that day after having been to see the attorney, Big Ernie came home. I was on the other side of the house sitting with my youngest son in their rec room. Big E came in and spoke to both of us and Jeremy said, Dad, why did you tell the police that your mother did that? Why would you write a statement that put all the blame on her? I'm not going to jail for anybody. She did it and I didn't. I think that is part of what caused my youngest son to completely turn his back on his father and have it put a wedge between um the two of them and it made their relationship astranged. I think for Jeremy it wasn't so much that I had done it but it was that he felt that his father was afraid and wasnÂt a real man to expose his wife like that and I felt that way myself.

Three weeks passed. I was still in a state of shock. I was in the bed all day everyday. I wasn't eating. I began to lose weight. I was just totally in a state of shock and I called my masseuse, Claudia. Up until that point she usually came to the house once a month. I called and told her what had happened and asked her to come. She came that Monday. She came to the house. She sat and talked with me for a few minutes and then gave me my usual 60-minute massage. I remember looking at the clock). She left at 4:00.

Because my family was close and communicated frequently, we had a series of codes we used to keep each other informed about things that were going on or things that needed to be discussed. We all had pagers and used them to communicate these codes: 711 was urgent, call me when you can, 811 was it's very important call me now, and 911 was someone is dead. About 4:30, I received a page from my brother, who still lived in Springfield, OH. He paged me 911 so I knew someone had died.

To purchase the BOOK..tynat259@yahoo.com

FOR PRAYER OR HELP WITH YOUR GRIEF EMAIL ME AT tynat259@yahoo.com.

"EXHALE AND GO TO JAIL!"

2005-11-12T12:14:00.000-08:00

Excerpts from my book,"Totally Overwhelmed".........
The next morning our church administrator called me and said the fire department, and the police, are all at the office Brother E's office. She said It looks like someone tried to set a fire she. Not admitting to anything, I listened to what she said, thanked her for keeping me informed, asked her to keep me posted, and hung up the phone. Later that morning Big E comes to the house and says, there was a fire at the office, it was on the news and they think that I tried to set the office on fire. And I told them what had happened and I had not done it and I told them that it was you. So I got on the phone and spoke with either the fire department or the police. I dont remember who it was but he called them and I told them that I had done it, that he didnt do it. My husband, the father of my children, my husband of 21 years, told Jeremy, our young son..that he was not going to jail for any one! You can imagine my pain and hurt.

So I knew I needed to get an attorney and there was a friend where I grew up. He grew up with my brother in Springfield, OH. I called him and he told me what to do. It was still Tuesday. Wednesday he said well Tyna you need to go and turn yourself in. I'm sure we can get an or Bond. So I did what I normally do, I went to get my hair done and then I went and met him at the Sheriff's office. It was there that I turned myself in. I have never experienced the humiliation and horrible treatment I experienced while in the Hamilton County Jail. I felt like a piece of worthless trash. When I first went in they hand cuffed me and placed my feet on the designated areas on the floor as they frisked me. This man yanks my arms up over this counter and places this thing with my name and all this information on it. I spent a total of 6 hours in the county jail and I will never ever forget that experience. I felt like I was in the inner circle of the devils house. I felt like I was in the devils inner sanctum. The spirits and the negativity and the evil that I felt in that place, I have never felt that way before in my entire life. And because I had never been arrested, thats why it took so long. They placed me in a large pod which was a large open cement based opened jail space. It was cement and when I got there was early in the afternoon and there were only maybe 2 people in there when I got there but because I was so long there so long people came in it was the oddest thing. I sat there by the clock and on one side of the large pod. No one would come near me. They wouldnt speak to me and no one would come near me. And I sat there and looked at the clock and I looked at the clock and I could not believe that I was in jail. And as the people came in none of them would sit near me. One lady came and sat in the corner and she fell asleep but no one would talk to me. They acted as if I was not there. So about the 5th or 6th hour going on the 5th hour I was there 2 homosexual women came in. You could tell they were in some kind of partnering or some relationship. And after they had been there a few minutes,I guess the man of the relationship walks over halfway to the room, she wouldn't come near me and she says ma'am you dont belong here. Are you alright? And I looked at her and I told her I was fine. And shortly thereafter, they called my name and opened the doors. the big glass door swung open and they said I could leave. The officer told me to follow the yellow line. When i got to the end of the yellow line I was following there stood Big E with my fur coat in his arms.

I have never been so humiliated in my life. They stripped me. They took the I had belt on, the and laces in my shoes. When it was dinner time, two mail inmates came around with a cart. the dinner menu was white beanswith a piece of ham(I guess), a cookie and kool-aid. I watched watch those young women barter for the cookies and barter for the beans. Ofcourse you know I couldnt eat! I said nothing all the way home.

If you are ANGRY about the state of your life...or if you feel you have been victimized BE CAREFUL. If you do the wrong thing for the right reason, you could end up in jail like me. I had never done anything against the law in my life but because I was not thinking clearly, I became a victim of my own anger!!

If you would like to be a part of my prayers or if you would like a copy of my book,"Totally Overwhelmed", contact me at tynat259@yahoo.com.

My Thoughts Around The Topic Of Anger.....

2005-11-12T11:25:00.000-08:00

The beginning of my "Anger"

2005-11-11T19:03:00.000-08:00

EXCERPTS FROM MY BOOK, "TOTALLY OVERWHELMED"

Although I did not feel that all my senses were operating at their maximum capability I did know that I needed to take someone with me, if for nothing more than as a witness to what took place. I called our Senior Deaconess (female deacon of the church) and she met me at her house. She brought with her another member of the church. So the Deaconess, the member, Jeremy and I went into the woman's house.

Prior to our arrival, I tried to convince Jeremy (14 years old) to stay in the car, but my efforts were to no avail. Although he was a child, he was mature, and I was somewhat glad that he went with me.

This woman lived in a very, very small apartment. I'll never forget when we walked through her front door. Once we had all entered, she escorted us into her living room. I couldn't help but notice she had gained a lot of weight. As I looked at her looking at me, I saw in her eyes and could sense through her body language that she fearful as if I was going to hurt her or something. As her pastor, as a mother, and as a woman it was pure instinct for me to calm her and assure her I was not there to harm her nor was that what I expected to happen. I simply sat adjacent to her and asked to repeat to me what she had previously told me on the phone. And right there on her living room sofa. She told me what happened. Later I found out she had received counseling from several ministers in the community and had been advised to do so. That let me know that people in the community and in the church knew a very critical piece of information about something going on in my life that even I didn't know. We weren't there more than 10 minutes and I had heard and seen everything that I needed to. As we walked out the door my youngest son grabbed me left arm. Somewhat embarrassed, (for me or for his father I'm not completely sure) I turned and looked at him. He whispered, "Mom she's telling the truth and Dad is lying."

My child had confirmed to me at that time what was the most devastating news of my life. So the Sr. Deaconess prayed with the member, Jeremy and I left and went home. It was then early Tuesday morning.

The ride home seemed like forever. With the passing of time, the closer we got to the house, the angrier I became. That shield that had protected my heart only hours before had completely desipated and anger now resided in that once joyous place. I was angry and I wanted answers. Once back in my bedroom, in that very same spot, where this nightmare, I called my ex-husband and I began to leave messages on his phone. They were threatening messages. He never returned my calls and he never came home.

I had such a high magnitude of so many emotions racing through my insides that I found myself no longer able to sit still. At about 3:00-4:oo am I decided to go to our office that he did business out of and get all of my belongings. In a subconscious attempt to comfort myself I put on one of my favorite coats and headed out the door. Passing by the fireplace that was in our family room, without thinking twice, I picked up a lighter and put it in my coat pocket and was on my way.

I am not an angry person by nature and therefore I had no idea so much anger could reside in one person. When I got to the office and began walking around I was nothing more than belittled by what lay before my eyes. I expected to enter into a functional office. What I found was a few file folders noting a couple of clients I was to believe required 50 plus hours of work a week. My thoughts were everywhere at this point. (He has all this time. He's not building his own business. What is he doing with all his time? Now I realize what he was doing with his time.)

As my anger boiled a calmness swept over me. I felt the Tyna I know whisk away escaping the harsh reality of the events that had transpired as some other person came over me. So I reached into my coat pocked, pulling out the lighter who's only other function had been to ignite fire to the wood in our fireplace, picked up one of his clientele folders and I lit it. Then I lit the other.

THE END FOR NOW...MORE LATER!

A Life-Changing Blow!!

2005-11-11T07:18:00.000-08:00

The moment I heard that the voice on the other end of my phone receiver I HEARD the quiet wings of change ruffle its feathers...

Her voice was quiet. I could hear a uncomfortable quiver accompany each of her words as she disclosed the reason for her call. She said, "I have been having an affair with your husband for some time and I felt you needed to know." For a minute I paused and so did everything around me. My eyes gazed quickly around the room before closing. The reality of what she said was not hitting me. I was hearing this quiet voice over and over and over but her words were not registering in my brain. They kept coming at me like a baseball flying towards a bat but the lining of my heart had become a shield, deflecting each one as it tried to filter beneath its surface. At the end of that moment, I told her the only thing appropriate thing that crept through my numb lips. I told her I would have to call her back.

I was still sitting on the edge of the bed, phone to the left of me, when my husband, at the time, came strolling in the house. I'd say it was about 1:30 AM.(He had a habit of staying out late. That was his pattern for the entire time we were married) No sooner than he walked through the bedroom door I told him about the phone call. He immediately began denying everything. As he denied it, the shield that had minutes before protected my heart softened and her words began plummeting in. He continued to talk. The sound of his voice hurt my ears. The sight of him made me nauseous. As pain and anger wrapped their arms around me I began to spit on him, beating him with the phone simultaneously. Throughout our marriage he was a runner. Whenever we had problems he fled the scene. This night was no different. He left....

I realize now the anger that I was feeling at the time was two fold. #1: As a Pastor I considered myself responsible for the people that I shepherded. They had entrusted me to care over their spiritual lives. I felt like my ex-husband had been a predator in the congregation. So not only was I angry that Satan had manipulated the psyche one of my sheep but my ex-husband was the catalyst of the sin.

#2: My husband had a history sexual problems which included pornography and other perversions. He was quite promiscuous, entreated by all kinds of pornography and had very late habits that were a byproduct of the infidelity that was an ongoing issue from the beginning of our relationship. It just hurt me to think that he would come into the church God had assigned us to and do that.

This woman was not a normal young 26 year old woman. She came to our church seeking help and guidance for her problems. I felt like I had let her down and had exposed her to a wolf and I felt so very angry and betrayed. I also felt that he had trespassed on one of the few thing that I felt responsible for the lives of the children of God.

So he leaves the house and I call the woman back. I ask her, even though it's late, if I can come over. I needed to know if she was telling me the truth. I needed to look her in her eyes and see if she was telling me the truth. So Jeremy, my youngest son, over hears the confrontation I was having with my ex-husband. My sons know when my voice is elevated and what it means when my voice is elevated. So my youngest son comes is determined he is going with me to see Lady X.

DON'T EVER THINK ..." YOUR SITUATION IS HOPELESS". All is not lost... You can make it through your darkest experiences!!

IF YOU NEED PRAYER, PLEASE EMAIL ME AT tynatduncan@gmail.com

You can purchase my book, "Totally Overwhelmed" via tynatduncan@gmail.com

MORE EXCERPT TOMMORROW!

MY HELL BEGAN...JANUARY, 1997

2005-11-10T15:05:00.000-08:00

It's amazing that you can get up one morning and feel as though everything in your life is GREAT. Life seems normal. Everything is going according to your plan but then... just one phone call can change the course of your life forever. But I knew at the end of 1996, things in my life were changing.

I felt the winds of my life was going to be changing and that's just what happened!

I had worked long and I worked hard some 12 to 15 years to build a sucessful life for me and my family. To watch that life come crashing down all at one time was very difficult. But here it is.

I thought writing this book would be an easy task. But it was difficult to rehearse, rethink and relive those experiences. However, if I am to continue to heal and to move forward ...I have to tell my story.

It was a Monday. The first Monday of January 1997. I remember it clearly because the night before we had taken Ernie, my oldest son, to the airport, to catch a flight, returning him to prep school. The air that Monday was brisk. It was cold but there was no snow that day. Throughout that day, I had been receiving a strange page from a number I did not recognize. Because it was strange, I ignored it. Not just once was I paged, nor twice, but repeatedly and repeatedly I ignored the seven digit number that appeared on the of my black Motorola pager. At about midnight that Monday night I received a phone call from one of my spiritual sons (in the church). He called to ask me if I had been receiving pages throughout the day from the phone number I saw repeatedly that day. I told him yes. He knew who had been paging me and told me that I needed to call that number because I needed to hear what that person had to say. I couldn't tell me what they wanted but his tone suggested it was important that I call. So sitting on the edge of my bed, I picked up the phone at something after midnight and made the call. It was at that moment I heard that the voice on the other end of my phone receiver that the quiet wings of change ruffled its feathers and life as I knew it was about TO ENTER HELL!

More excerpts tomorrow!!

Email me if you need prayer at...tynat259@yahoo.com.

You can purchase a copy of my book via tynatduncan@gmail.com. Be Blessed!!

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